b3ta.com user Sufficiently unusual & humorous at times
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» Sacked

Four years ago...
After training me up to be a star sales person and promising me a rewarding wage when I proved my ability my mew employers then shut in the back room of a windowless office. Luckily I was given the repetitive and dull task of putting earrings into little clear packets to keep me occupied.

Three years later my self-confidance had been whittled to a matchstick and I no longer even considered the possibility that I could perform any other task. Then, just two days before Christmas my boss came up to me and said I could pick anything in the shop I wanted - as a gift! I was startled and suprised, perhaps I was valued after all.

She saw the glee on my face and quickly clarified the situation. "Oh no,not for xmas, it's for your leaving present. You're leaving in the new year. Remember?" She then fabricated a discussion wherein I had said that I wanted to explore other avenues of employment; and she'd be happy to support mu decision. She said this all quite firmly. Needless to say that the conversation did not take place with me involved in it.

Woo! Sacked in the name of leaving AND two days before xmas! It turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to me, but at the time....
(Wed 1st Mar 2006, 23:35, More)

» Worst Nicknames Ever

we like songs
James the cat...
(sing to the tune of Jake the peg)
is really fat
Couldn't sit on your lap
Cause he'd squash you flat

We used to wait inside the school gates for the poor bugger to arrive and chant it as he walked in. Bit long though.

Mum used to call me Ichabod for no reason but to make me mad. This was shortened to Icky which was worse. Conjures up unpleasant associations doesn't it.

My favorite was 'mushroom head' given to a girl in my 3rd form class who recieved a very unfortunate haircut, she grew it out over the next four years but retained the name mushroomhead indefinately.
(Mon 22nd May 2006, 1:50, More)