b3ta.com user dysonology
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» Random Acts of Evil

Well there was the time...
When I made the mistake of going on /talk.
(Fri 17th Feb 2012, 15:30, More)

» British Slang Dictionary

Apples and pears
(Fri 22nd Jan 2016, 16:34, More)

» Street Life

When I was about 18 or 19...
...my first job was working security/front desk up in Soho in the mid 90s, running errands and stuff. One day was walking through the other side of Walker's Court when a sweet old lady in a pink coat came up to me, blue rinse, the works. She looked a bit like the Queen Mum.
"Excuse me? Young man! Hello dear"
"Yes hello, can I help?" Perhaps she was lost, what a sweet old lady with a nice crinkly smile.

Quick as a snake, she grabbed my hand and started stroking it, then pulled my face towards hers and, rattling her false teeth in her mouth with a slosh and a whistle, said: "I'll suck your cock for a fiver."
(Fri 10th Jul 2015, 10:24, More)

» Devastating Put-Downs

Went to a "comedy" night...
...with an Aussie mate. One of those in a pub with a sort of small stage and some cheap seats. Comedian comes on stage with a stool and his dog, as he comes on he says "laugh, or the dog gets it".
Sits on stool and picks up microphone. JUST before he utters his first word, Aussie yells "sorry about your dog mate!" Everyone laughs, bloke has no come back to the point his eyes brimmed and he looked like he was about to bolt.
Ruined the poor guy's set so badly we bought him a drink after.
(Mon 28th Nov 2011, 10:04, More)

» Books

Oh, and...
Dispatches, by Michael Herr. Changed my understanding of how writing works.

He went on to do the screenplay for Full Metal Jacket.

Read all abaaaaaht it
(Tue 10th Jan 2012, 20:47, More)
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