b3ta.com user Shamelesspendant
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» Cunning Plans

Am I jumping the gun Baldrick
or are the words "I have a cunning plan" marching with ill-deserved confidence in the direction of this conversation?
(Thu 5th Jul 2012, 14:31, More)

» Getting Old

Waking up
at five in the morning and watching something incomprehensible on open university because the magic roundabout comes on at six.
(Fri 8th Jun 2012, 15:50, More)

» The Apocalypse

Doused in Africa
and set alight, this is how the world ends not with a bang but a whoomphh and the smell of teenagers masterbating.
(Fri 15th Jun 2012, 15:19, More)

» Foot in Mouth Syndrome II

dead man's chair
Some family friends of the missus's lost a young husband/father (careless I know)who we all knew as Jez. So obviously when I'm round there house and the missus goes to sit down I say; "Don't sit there that's Jeremie's chair!" totally out of the blue and for no particular reason.

Turns out that was his real name and I felt like an utter cunt.
(Fri 17th Aug 2012, 15:07, More)

» Home Science

Can of Lynx Africa and a Zippo
Endless home entertainment, also useful for making chemical burns on other peoples hands and lighting farts. Not to mention the scores of woman attracted to the manly smell.
(Tue 14th Aug 2012, 13:10, More)
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