b3ta.com user D-Fenz
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Profile for D-Fenz:
Profile Info:

My name is barry.

i have a cat and another cat.

Recent front page messages:

Okay so i lied
I had to get one more starwars post!

(Tue 25th Feb 2003, 15:46, More)

Fast food

Kinda reminds me of going to Mc Donalds in Kirkcaldy.
(Tue 25th Feb 2003, 14:17, More)

Still waiting for alcohol
The animals of Farthing wood never knew what hit them!

(Wed 29th Jan 2003, 21:15, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Workplace Boredom

i don't so much work....
i just turn up. I have been a barman for years and at this time of year it gets very quiet. To be honest that hasn't stopped me dicking about every shift. My managers have now given up hope of me actually doing anything productive with my shifts so just let me get on with it.

here are a few things i have made while at work.

Wasted time doodling

A pirate made from a single cork

My fighting armour

The start of the beer box zombie invasion

this last one took 3 days to complete. and i haven't got any pictures of the end result. booo.

I have also made a working cannon from a bottle of rum (works on the same principles as a potato gun). a catapult from straws pens and elastic bands. a horse to go along with my armour. and many many beer box head mask things that i make drunk students wear.

Work is the easy part, keeping my self amused is the challenge
(Fri 9th Jan 2009, 12:56, More)

» Accidental innuendo

first ever question of the week.
A couple of years back whilst out doing man shopping (looking at tv's stereos etc) with my mates, my friend Mike decided he needed to get new curtains or his missus would kill him. So off we trot to the curtain shop and and find this lovely old lady to help him find suitable stuff.

this is the best bit the first thing the old lady said was "so sonny, how big is your pole?" now i don't think i have ever seen 5 grown men be reduced to giggling schoolboys so fast. we ran in 5 diferent directions and when we though we were all out of earshot broke down into fits of laughter. then when we calmed down all we heard from the old lady was "oh grow up"

she didn't see the funny side and neither did mike as we left him stranded on his own trying not to laugh.
(Mon 16th Jun 2008, 10:36, More)

» Pure Ignorance

Our mates girlfriend Karen
Although we do love karen to bits she is undeniably thick as pig shit!

1: Karen was fooled into believing that stevie wonder regained his site after having an eye tranplant from his pet tiger. She even said "i didn't know he was blind! When did that happen?"

2: We convinced her in the pub one night that the E.I.E.I.O was the farmers union and all the farmers were going on strike.

3: We convinced her that Smitherines was a place in Africa near Moroco. And that the term blown to smitherines came from the first world war. She told everyone at her work that smitherines was a real place and there was much giggling.

The worst part is she saves peoples lives. Now would you let this person fit you with a pacemaker???
(Mon 10th Jan 2005, 15:56, More)