b3ta.com board
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Messageboard » Spoons » Message 10617295

[challenge entry] Soulless pub chain announces new logo
Well they have to do something to appear 'edgy' or whatever.

Wetherspoons

From the Spoons challenge. See all 209 entries (closed)

(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 17:55, archived)
# Spooooonzzz! ;-)
A freind sent me this earlier, if any of you like spoonerisms or can be bothered to read it....


This is the story of Rindercella and her sugly isters.

Rindercella and her sugly isters lived in a marge lansion. Rindercella worked very hard frubbing sloors, emptying poss pits, and shivelling shot.
At the end of the day, she was knucking fackered. The sugly isters were right bugly astards.. One was called Mary Hinge, and the other was called Betty Swallocks; they were really forrible huckers; they had fetty sweet and fatty swannies.
The sugly isters had tickets to go to the ball, but the cotton runts would not let Rindercella go.

Suddenly there was a bucking fang, and her gairy fodmother appeared.

Her name was Shairy Hithole and she was a light rucking fesbian. She turned a pumpkin and six mite wice into a hucking cuge farriage with six dandy ronkeys who had buge hollocks and dig bicks. The gairy fodmother told Rindercella to be back by dimnlight otherwise, there would be a cucking falamity.

At the ball, Rindercella was dancing with the prandsome hince when suddenly the clock struck twelve. "Mist all chucking frighty!!!" said Rindercella, and she ran out tripping barse over ollocks, so dropping her slass glipper.

The very next day, the prandsome hince knocked on Rindercella's door and the sugly isters let him in. Suddenly, Betty Swallocks lifted her leg and let off a fig bart. "Who's fust jarted?" asked the prandsome hince. "Blame tha! t fugly ucker over there!!" said Mary Hinge.

When the stinking brown cloud had lifted, he tried the slass glipper on both the sugly isters without success and their feet stucking funk.

Betty Swallocks was ducking fisgusted and gave the prandsome hince a knack in the kickers. This was not difficult as he had bucking fuge halls and a hig bard on. He tried the slass glipper on Rindercella and it fitted pucking ferfectly.

Rindercella and the prandsome hince were married. The pransome hince lived his life in lucking fuxury, and Rindercella lived hers with a follen swanny!
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:13, archived)
# Hang on, when did this become /talk?
*harumphs

Have you got any LOL cat pictures too? I for one would love to see them!
/sarcasm
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:14, archived)
# Not enough swearing for talk...! I must admit I didn;t think it was going to look like so many words before I posted it...
It looked smaller.....
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:19, archived)
# Plus the concentration level here doesn't go over one paragraph....
Ooo shiney.

THREADSAVE
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:21, archived)
# Ha-ha!
Excellent.
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:32, archived)
#
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:50, archived)
# Equally excellent.
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:53, archived)
# Obvious one here
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 19:21, archived)
# Heyyyy!
Do your own crap matting! I recognise those clone lines on the collar!
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 20:09, archived)
# I'll get on to making some cat pictures...! ;-)
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:20, archived)
#
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:22, archived)
# That are my feline freinds...!
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:44, archived)
# You are Roy Chubby Brown
AICMFP.

Next up - old ladies swearing = hilarious
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:18, archived)
# Now,
Old men dressed as old women eating cream cakes... absolute hilarity!
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:19, archived)
# It claimed to be Ronnie Barker....
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:21, archived)
# RTF
WIS?
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:19, archived)
# I thought it might make people smile ;-(
I must admit, looking at the length I was perhaps wrong, but it looked smaller befor I posted,

Do I need to lower my trousers and turn around?
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:25, archived)
# Bah, ignore the miserable buggers
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:30, archived)
# I am.! ;-)
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:33, archived)
# Yes
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:30, archived)
# Just be gentle
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:34, archived)
# HEY EVERYONE I FOUND SOMTHING ON THE INTERNETS/WAS SENT SOMETHING BY A FRIEND
I'M GOING TO POST IT WITHOUT THINKING!

my inlaws have been doing this as a christmas party piece for at least the last 5 years as i remember seeing it before mydaugher was born.
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:22, archived)
# OOOoooooooooo please!
I need more "LOL" make sure it involves cats or fat people on small vehicles!
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:23, archived)
# It's in an existing thread, and I admited miscalculating the size as it would appear....
Just lube up befor you punish me..
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:27, archived)
# The thing about spoonerisms is that they're still supposed to make some kind of sense after you swap the letters round.
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:22, archived)
# I Tike lhis
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:26, archived)
# or lop the sweaters round, maybe
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:30, archived)
# Just looks like I failed at trying to make people smile....
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:31, archived)
# I just read all of that and there's no pucking funch line?
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:23, archived)
#
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:26, archived)
# I'll make a complaint on your behalf ;-)
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:44, archived)
# sheesh, I remember passing that round in 1980, when the internet was just photocopiers!
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:31, archived)
# I.v never seen it..! I didn't think it was joke of the year or anything.....
Just thought it might make someone pfft, but seriously miscalculated how long it was... :-(
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:37, archived)
# And then you got it from a mimeograph copy.
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:37, archived)
# dl;tr
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:32, archived)
# Awe no's......!
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:41, archived)
# Kind of wordy, but I liked the bit about feet.
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:34, archived)
# I didn't realise how long it was or that it was really well know....
Can't you just tell me off like everyone else ;-)
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:42, archived)
# This couldn't be done with Robin Hood
... because of friar tuck!
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:40, archived)
# ;-)
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 18:46, archived)
# Words
So, so many words!
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 19:15, archived)
# I know...!
I just didn't realise how many there were myself untill after I'd posted it... ;-(
How long do I have to stand on my chair facing the wall!
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 19:21, archived)
# I just found a really lazy way of saying "tl;dr"
It's merely

~

tl;dr - tilde - ~.
(, Tue 29 Nov 2011, 20:20, archived)