b3ta.com board
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Messageboard » XXX » Message 9024336 (Thread)

# BAN THIS SICK FILTH NOW!
Ning, board!




Apologies for shoddiness. Just had to get it out.
(I helped save b3ta! Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:42, archived)
# Hahahaha
I saw one of their headlines the other day about the possibility of a postal strike: POSTMEN SABOTAGE CHRISTMAS.
(I helped save b3ta! riverghost servicing your mum since, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:43, archived)
# ...
It was actually a pretty devout Christian doctor who pointed out to me that Christians oughtn't to have a problem with hybrid embryos, since they've been worshipping a strange clone/ hybrid thingy for the best part of 2000 years anyway...
(I helped save b3ta! Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:46, archived)
# Christ
those poor people. They get shat on royally.

Also, people who work in post offices that are franchises are going to get it in the neck as well, and they don't even get any of the post office benefits or salaries or anything. My best friend runs a post office franchise and gets paid minimum wage for it.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:46, archived)
# Ironically the only people threatening strike action are some sorting offices.
So the postmen had nothing to do with it.
(I helped save b3ta! riverghost servicing your mum since, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:48, archived)
# :-(
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:49, archived)
# Paaaaat! Paaaat! What have you done to me Paaaat!:P
(I helped save b3ta! riverghost servicing your mum since, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:50, archived)
# They won't gt shat on
They'll be walking at precisely 4.1mph, and it's very difficult to aim a poo at that speed.
(I helped save b3ta! Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:51, archived)
# and they've been issued with special poo-hammocks to stop it happening
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:53, archived)
# Hello, oh sweet and fragrant Nibes
how does Monday morning find you?
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:54, archived)
# hello capt
I am ooooo-k except I have a nasty cough, which means I am only 3 steps from death

are you feeling all better now?
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 10:09, archived)
# Yes, although I am a bit parp-y.
It's ok, you're safe where you are. Bloody toast.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 10:10, archived)
# I think I once slept in a poo-hammock




I've disgusted myself now
(I helped save b3ta! Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:55, archived)
# Haha
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:48, archived)
# hahahahahah!
having been told the story of the nativity since I was a small child, and going along with it back then - well the priest reads it out on christmas day mass, the teachers all tell it etc so it must be true, now I'm older and wiser the idea that Mary has to say "Errr, Joseph, I know we've not been trying for a baby, but I'm preggers. Oh, but don't worry, God did it" has to be one of the funniest excuses in the history, of, well, history
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:49, archived)
# Would this not make god a hypocrite too?
He's going round telling everyone not to have sex out of wedlock...
(I helped save b3ta! riverghost servicing your mum since, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:51, archived)
# weblock? well If he can't access internet pr0n, I guess he'd have too....
:D
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:53, archived)
# Weblock obviously is when you get married
by someone who has an internet indoctoration.
(I helped save b3ta! riverghost servicing your mum since, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:54, archived)
# He didn't have sex, though.
He just sort of flung it across the cosmos with a sort of angelic turkey-baster and - SHAZAM - the deed was done.
(I helped save b3ta! Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:53, archived)
# So basically you're saying Mary got preggers
by divine bukkake?
(I helped save b3ta! riverghost servicing your mum since, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:55, archived)
# This is all fodder for when I become a vicar, you realise.
You bastards are going to make me the worst vicar ever.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:56, archived)
# Well I'm a priest all ready!
I don't want to hear your sermons: A lo the lord said to Mary, 'Wipe yourself off dear it everywhere!'
ANd Mary did say, 'I think some is in my ear!'
(I helped save b3ta! riverghost servicing your mum since, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:59, archived)
# Remind me not to let you baptise my children...
(I helped save b3ta! Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:59, archived)
# The chances of you baptising your children are?
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 10:00, archived)
# About the same chance of him having them:P
EDIT: Oh deary dear. No 1 on the statsboard:(
(I helped save b3ta! riverghost servicing your mum since, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 10:01, archived)
# Close to zero, admittedly...
(I helped save b3ta! Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 10:01, archived)
# There you go, then.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 10:03, archived)
# "flung it across the cosmos"? Hahahahah!
I hope it's not a regular thing....

"Houston, this is the International Spacestation, we have a problem, there's Godspunk in orbital manouvering thruster 5 again...."
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:56, archived)
# This would be a tea-on-keyboard moment,
if only I had some tea nearby.
(I helped save b3ta! Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 10:00, archived)
# Pffft
another exclusive!
'nings all!
:D
(I helped save b3ta! XLVII .uk, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:55, archived)
# hahaha
(I helped save b3ta! k3b/-\b Peace man., Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:56, archived)
# God's cock should have split her in half
I can't imagine being omnipotent and not having a massive schlong.
(I helped save b3ta! Brandy_Bumwinkle, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 9:57, archived)
# No, no...
It's a *metaphysical* cock, meaning it's not actually physically there, just there as a broad concept, and everyone knows that you can squeeze a broad concept into any cnut.....
(EffinDoubt is breaking glass on, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 11:51, archived)
# Ha Ha
Nice - though I won't use this for the MU carol service this afternoon
(I helped save b3ta! nhojjohn, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 10:34, archived)
# CYLONS?!
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Scunner She’s a he, technically, but she’s scalding hot, Mon 15 Dec 2008, 10:39, archived)