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This is a question Wanking Disasters Part II

Despite the warnings contained in our previous question on The Act of Onan, you all still appear to be masturbating like monkeys in a zoo. Tell us your stories of jerking the gherkin and double-clicking the mouse.

Suggested by Mrs Entity and DaveExclamationMark, voted for by YOU

(, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 12:22)
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This is true.
Wotcha, Dave.
(, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 15:38, 2 replies)
The internet
Where men pretend to be 16-year-old girls and 16-year-old girls pretend to be cats, cartoon characters and who knows what else.
(, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 16:23, closed)
Men.

(, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 16:26, closed)
Is that you, Dave?

(, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 16:43, closed)
You're my Dave now...

(, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 16:49, closed)
Alright?
a/s/l?

Me = 48/M/wherever my truck takes me.
(, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 17:04, closed)
16/f/soham

(, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 17:11, closed)
PHWOAR.
See you by the school gates tomorrow, wear red.
(, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 20:36, closed)

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