I can relate to this
www.b3ta.com/questions/bullies/post424211
being half German.
I was born in Germany but I only spent the first 5 years of my life there. My parents moved to the UK and I've spent the rest of my life here.
Yes I have a German surname but as I have an English forename and no accent you'd be hard pressed to tell my bloodline.

In school the surname was enough though and so I went various name calling and thigh slapping episodes which so many people have said are character building.

However, what really pisses me off is that these things still go on.

Some people I meet feel it's amusing and OK to take the piss with a comedy German accent, rename me "Fritz" and one or two have really gone the whole nine yards and suggested I may like to gas a Jew or two.

But please, if you are going to be xenophobic at least be consistant. That way I can deal with you as an ignorant racist cunt that you are. Don't expect me to respond to Fritz and when you finally do use my given name, and don't expect me to be civil.

Rant over, apologies for the complete and utter lack of funny and possibly tenuous QOTW linkage.
(zebby wasting irony here on, Wed 20 May 2009, 13:45, 16 replies)

Same here...
Except I'm half Paddy too - and it was great-grand-daddy who hailed from Koblenz but my surname is obviously German.

I've been nicknamed "Himmler" in my time and do a nice line in extremely tasteless humour.

I can also dig a fucking mean driveway.

[edit] Have a sympathy click on me.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 20 May 2009, 13:54, closed)

Hmmm... PJM...
Peiter Josef Mengele?
( Cawl, Wed 20 May 2009, 14:03, closed)

Piss Off
My great uncle Josef was a decorated war hero.

He shot down two Me109s and damaged a Me110 during the Battle of Britain. You know the thanks he got?

Bastards threw him out the Luftwaffe and took his Iron Cross away.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 20 May 2009, 14:15, closed)

Haha!
My Great Grandad + Auschwitz + Died + Guardtower = LOL
( Cawl, Wed 20 May 2009, 14:18, closed)

True Story Alert
My family's home in Germany was actually taken comandeered by the local Gestapo who promptly turfed the family out.

When they returned to their house after the war, they had to deal with the less than savoury history of the place in addition to finding their antique furniture had been vandalized by a bunch of thugs.

My father went to stay there in the 1950s while he was doing his national service with the RAF...
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 20 May 2009, 14:22, closed)

You should be fine
as long as you don;t mention the war...
(Fuckarma was masturbating into your handbag, Wed 20 May 2009, 13:56, closed)

Lack of funny?
That's not very German.
( wotofco pissing in your swimming pool, Wed 20 May 2009, 14:05, closed)

Yeah, I had the same problem
but I got the last laugh: whenever someone made a 'did your grandad gas the Jews?' joke, I'd supress a smile.

He did a bang-up job manning the ovens, slipped the net after WWII and is still with us today at a spritely 89 years young!

And he gets his gas paid for by the government ever year (Heating allowance). He winks at me and tells me its just like old times.

I heart Onkel Fritzie. :)
( Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Wed 20 May 2009, 14:07, closed)

"Wir wollen ein Auto mieten"
/Fawlty Towers
( jim_bob can herd cats., Wed 20 May 2009, 14:14, closed)

I'm Spanish
And in England I used to get a lot of "why, you don't fancy killing a few more south america indians?"

I used to smile and remind them about India, Australia, North America... They shut up.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 20 May 2009, 14:14, closed)

Exactly
Britain - We invented the Concentration Camp FFS!
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 20 May 2009, 14:16, closed)

Bemannen Sie das Bumsen oben.
Edit - translates back as Man the bumsen above. *laughs*


Bloody babelfish.
( girlinthehole, Wed 20 May 2009, 14:24, closed)

I feel your pain, I have a french surname...
...which can be linked quite easily to threesome jokes... huzah! :(
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Wed 20 May 2009, 14:29, closed)

But, what about actual threesomes?
we haven't mentioned these enough this week).
(MichaelS wasn't picked again, Wed 20 May 2009, 14:37, closed)

Aww...
...maybe the next QOTW will be threesome-related and you can have a whole week of threesome joy?!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Wed 20 May 2009, 14:41, closed)

I hope not
it'll mean a week of people posting links to this:
www.b3ta.com/questions/sexualmisconceptions/post258292/
( uberdeity Wondered why Owen Lars knew of the term "hell" on, Wed 20 May 2009, 16:00, closed)