Childhood AmbitionsHoratioFellatio writes:
"At the tender age of 13, my little hairless clockweights squirted their first dose of testosterone into my blood stream. The result was a mental alarm clock shouting, 'I NEED TO LOOK AT GIRL'S FANNIES.' I reasoned that if I became a Gynaecologist, I'd get to look at fannies all day.
"It was only when I reached the age of about 16 and learnt about STD's and yeast infections that I realised I'd only ever get to see diseased ones."
Tell us about your childhood career ambitions and the moment at which your aspirations crumbled into a pile of broken dreams.
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chthonic, Thu 29 Mar 2007, 12:02)
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When I grew upI always wanted to meet Michael Jackson, dunno why... but then when I got old enough to realize why they kept talking about him and little children on the news channels they meant something other than them just meeting him and it kind of put me off :(
Also from about the age of 5-10 I wanted to play in my dads pub band because it seemed really glamourous at the time. Anyways, after that I just forgot about it cause I didn't really want to and I ended up learning to play guitar and playing rhythmn guitar for them one new years eve when I was fourteen and I discovered it was the shittest thing ever. A guitar starts to feel really heavy when you've had it on your shoulders for almost three hours playing non stop. And it's kinda worrying when the rest of the band start playing a song you've never even heard before and are expecting you to play along. And all the time there's about 400 drunk faces trying to celebrate new years eve with some little kid on stage trying to play guitar.
Got £200 for it though so I guess it wasn't all bad :o
EDIT: wow and I wanted to breed ants too :o
(, Thu 29 Mar 2007, 14:59, Reply)
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