Or,
Are you aged 14-16 and have eschewed your tax-payer funded education for a life of petty crime and benefits dependancy you ungrateful little shit? Was it the terminal illness of a close relative that made you go off the rails and have caused you to develop a "what's the fucking point" attitude? With a vanishinly small percentage of the necessary instruction in surgery, do you think you could gamble the life of your relative by operating on them, your hands trembling as you make the first incision, your vision blurred by the tears that drip down off your cheeks into the wavering, bleeding gashes you've made into their flesh? A gamble with odds so long that there is precious hope that you may extend their life and will more likely just kill them there on the table under the bright lights and the relentless scrutiny of our cameras.

Our producers would like to speak to you.

Yeah, I reckon I could take over his column in The Guardian
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 12:55, Reply)