Neutrogena shower gel
The smell of Neutrogena shower gel reminds me of the first time I ever showered with a girl, just the merest whiff evokes that memory and gives me the raging horn.

However, this once got me into trouble. A few years ago I was dissatisfied with my life, the endless grind of work was getting me down and I didn’t feel like I was achieving anything worthwhile. It was in this frame of mind that I stumbled into a church and confessed all to a kindly priest. In a flood of tears I explained how I found modern life to be unsatisfying and uncaring and that I would like to become a Catholic and perhaps even join the priesthood. The priest calmed me down and said that becoming a Catholic was a serious matter and that I should take some time to think about it. He suggested that I come back after a month of abstaining from pleasures of the flesh and lustful thoughts and desires, then he would discuss my future with the church.

I returned a month later and the kindly priest asked me how I had got on. I explained that everything had gone well for the first 3 weeks, but then I picked up a bottle of Neutrogena shower gel and made the mistake of giving it a sniff. This caused such a powerful recollection of past sexual experiences that I was so overcome with lust I couldn’t help but masturbate furiously, after 3 weeks of clean living the release was incredible and I had the most explosive orgasm of my life, hot jizz squirted everywhere. The priest looked at me in horror and told me that I was no longer welcome in the Catholic church, I explained that I quite understood as I was no longer welcome in Tesco’s either.

Some of the above is not true, but the smell of Neutrogena DOES gives me a stonking bonk-on which is about as close to a sexual fetish as a boring accountant such as myself is likely to get.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 22 Oct 2009, 15:08, 5 replies)

The neutrogena sea salt type one?
Works a treat. I concur.
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Thu 22 Oct 2009, 15:12, closed)

The clear stuff that's supposed to be gentle on your skin
phwoar
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 22 Oct 2009, 15:15, closed)

^ Nice
But imagine what the priest would have said if you confessed to having "a posh one."
We'll have none of that in the Catholic Church!
(Connor Lingus is running this monkey farm now, Thu 22 Oct 2009, 15:13, closed)

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 22 Oct 2009, 15:17, closed)

Ok, I admit it; I have never masturbated in Tesco’s
I was too embarrassed to admit that I was in Aldi
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 22 Oct 2009, 15:29, closed)