Also ban the phrase "A Feast of Family Fun, this Christmas on BBC"
...because it makes my blood run cold and my colon go into spasm.

In fact, let's just ban christmas all together. We'll have a big party at New Years eve, but otherwise let's reclaim the last half of the year and stop fannying about trying to find the perfect gift for relatives we don't even like, in shops full of over-priced tinselled tat that you wouldn't inflict on your least favourite traffic warden for the rest of the year.

Oh, and can we all please agree that it's been quite a few decades since we were young enough to be excited by a few coloured lights and shiny plastic?
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 9:17, 1 reply)

Yay! Ban Christmas!
That's how you find out how dedicated environmentalists and politicians are to saving the environment. All this crap about carbon is directed at energy production and transport, but you'll never hear an environmentalist or a politician suggest banning a wasteful and unproductive activity like Christmas. None of them seem to realise that we can achieve more by not being so utterly wasteful. If we stop producing substandard, useless crap and actually build something to last, then we save a whole load of resources, don't have to manufacture as much and therefore produce less CO2.

Just imagine Time Team in 200 years time uncovering a 21st century "midden"... "Ooo Ar! We can date that exactly. It's all stratified archaeology. Thar be turkey bones, heelies, turkey bones, scooters, turkey bones, Tracey island, turkey bones, furbies"
(An eejit passing by in a purple satin skirt with sparkly bits, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 11:59, closed)