And that, kids, is why you shouldn't smoke pot
This is a moral lesson about what happens if you flirt forever and never try to make a move.

I had known this guy for about six months, and we seemed trapped in the "friend zone" where we would send each other texts/various online comments that were slightly sexual but in that way where if our advances were rejected we could just say "I was kidding! I don't actually want to pay you for sex! It was a joke, LOL, how about we forget it happened..."

He kept making these hints about how he loved redheads (yeah, I'm the sexy kind of redhead), and how he liked women with nice feet (fetish-quality feet over here) and so on, but he never grew a pair and tried to bang me.

One fateful night I decided to do that thing where you think about something a whole bunch until you totally blow up at a person instead of having a civilized conversation about what's bothering you. So I sent him a text at 1am: Were you ever planning on trying to fuck me, or what?

What I didn't know is that he had just gotten really high. Long story short, I spent the next two days trying to talk him off the ledge because I had so totally scared the shit out of him and he was paranoid that the question was some sort of trap.


Epilogue: sex.
(Exempt OH WOW, VICODIN, Sun 21 Feb 2010, 3:29, 4 replies)

been there ...
It's now 6 years in the friend zone ... I've always adored her but for one reason or another its never happened. Now she's married with one daughter and a lad on the way, I'm engaged with two kids and one on the way ... and the magic has kind of faded. I have been on anti depressants for a year now and they keep me off the ledge ... just. Congratulations to you and I hope its for real.
(hangableautobulb is an anagram of the best album ever, on, Sun 21 Feb 2010, 19:48, closed)

So let's get this straight
You offered him sex on a plate and he didn't get the munchies.
(Dwarfsmuggler Has hogtied Snow White, Tue 23 Feb 2010, 13:27, closed)

^^ that's just brilliant
:)
( snee held his breath since, Tue 23 Feb 2010, 13:54, closed)

Precisely.
That is a great way of putting it.
(Exempt OH WOW, VICODIN, Thu 25 Feb 2010, 9:34, closed)