Julia
I feel inspired by "Hernandez Fiendish"'s post.

So, Julia - name changed to protect the whacko - was my nemesis using the same logic there.

At Uni, there were 5 of us, Steve, Mani, Nicki, Julia and me - we were the best of friends (still are - apart from Julia). Unfortunately, I fancied Julia. A lot. And despite the fact that I thought I hid it, it was, without a doubt, the most obvious thing in the world - in fact, if I'd tattood to my head "JTW loves Julia" it might have been less obvious.

It started well, we'd hang out, go to all the same lectures, stay at each others houses/halls/etc, go out together for all meals and nights out - we were all inseperable friends. What I didn't notice was the fact that I was, slowly, being manipulated by Julia.

She knew how I felt about her (hell, everyone did) but she had a boyfriend - I was single and sinfully geeky so I had no chance whatsoever at pulling on a night out. On those rare occasions where I **nearly** pulled, Julia would storm over, announce herself as my girlfriend and scupper any chances I had.

She didn't want me, but wanted to make damned sure that noone else could have me - she did a bang up job of it too as I didn't hook up with anyone I met at uni (there were two who I'd met at college and were outside of her influence - that being the equally mad Vicki and the lesbian Dawn - don't ask).

She treated me like shit too - fetch this, get that, carry this, pay for that - I, like a moron, obliged.

A couple of things stand out though:

* A uni "ball" - Ok, I was drunk, but she didn't discourage me from "flirting" with her (well, she started it and I carried on in my own awkward and, frankly, embarassing fashion) in front of her then boyfriend (who was a little more psycho than the good Mr Lecter) to the point where he wanted to stave my head in but it was my friend Steve who stopped him - NOT her.
* A night out in some club in Sheffield where she, for reasons that I can't even remember, threw a pint over me for "not paying her attention" even though I'd been keeping her company all night.
* My 21st where she originally hadn't planned to come as she was seeing her boyfriend and she then, at the last minute, came and then spent the evening crying about some problem with her boyfriend and moaning about the party - which my Mum had organised, let my friends stay over at hers and paid for.
* Her and a friend of hers flirting with 2 guys all night who, obviously, thought they were in, but then at the last minute after several hours of come-on the girls decided that me and my friend Mark were "their boyfriends" and we "weren't happy" with those two fridge sized gentlemen.
* At my uni house, coming over, getting hammered then throwing up on the porch and in the hallway and then complaining when my housemates were pissed off with her.
* After I left uni I, tragically, moved to a house near her in Greenhill - Sheffield and she demanded a key to the house. She didn't get it as Steve wouldn't allow it (I was going to though...)
* At that house warming demanding that the couch be moved outside - I did just that.
* Trying to freeze out my then girlfriend (who eventually came to be my wife (and ultimately ex-wife) who hated Julia - quite rightly too)
* Agreeing to come over to mine with all my friends for a night out and then cancelling on that morning for a hastily planned BBQ instead. It was bad enough that Steve and Mani couldn't make it for geographical reasons, but at that I was, inexplicably, crushed.
* When I realised what was going on, 3rd year at uni, and I started to stand up to her, she made every effort to put me down to everyone and wouldn't accept that I was no longer her lackey.

How was she my nemesis - Looking back, she was my closest friend for a while, but she did her damndest to ensure that I wasn't happy and was her "bitch".

It took me years to get over her, even when I was with the girl I was with. I felt like I'd had my heart ripped out, shown to me and then replaced with a rust spoon. I never quite worked out why a friend would turn on me like that.

I tried to patch things up with her after uni which failed as she wouldn't recognise or apologise for what she did - And I was forced to accept that she'd never be my friend again.

She did ask to be my friend on Facebook, but that was "ignored" - it's a real shame that notification can't be sent back - y'know with a "fuck off" message.... She, unfortunately, features in a Facebook photo set of mine as she was with us all at my graduation - can't be helped and I'm not petty enough to edit her out.

My friends like to remind me of this as, now, it's something I can laugh about as it was pretty much pathetic behaviour on my part.

One friend of mine decided, after I told him about this, that he was intrigued and went out with her for a few years. I pitied him and I got to hear that she, ultimately, is still a grade A whack-job.

One thing I do know is that in the intervening period, I now look about 100 times better than I did then, whereas she got chubby and her ass got big :)

Wow, I got carried away there - ahhh - b3ta therapy :)


ETA - if you're a Facebook friend of mine, I'll link you to a photo of her and even tell you her real name :)
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Wed 5 May 2010, 13:52, 14 replies)

Christ
What a bitch.
( Turquoise Hexagon Sun has just dropped acid on, Wed 5 May 2010, 14:09, closed)

The way you've told it
It sounds just as much your own fault as it is hers.
( Dervel OTBC, Wed 5 May 2010, 15:13, closed)

Probably....
I should have wised up sooner, but then again, should I have been treated as such?
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Wed 5 May 2010, 15:22, closed)

She sounds a bit like a girl I worked with.
I never liked her but she manipulated another friend of mine and once even threw a pint over and slapped the other friend's husband and screamed 'I WON'T BE YOUR WHIPPING BOY, HADYN'. As far as I was aware, Hadyn had done fuck all. Zoe was a fucking FRUIT CAKE.

Real names because I doube that they're on here.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 5 May 2010, 15:38, closed)

glad that
you can laugh about it now. :) She sounds horrible.
(Hernandez Fiendish probably won't be here until at least, say, Wed 5 May 2010, 16:06, closed)

A while
It took me a while, but I can now....
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Wed 5 May 2010, 20:44, closed)

I have to admit
I misread the "Grade A whack-job" bit. Sounded better my way.
( Ungersven would support SpankyHanky's patreon, Wed 5 May 2010, 19:52, closed)

I'm not a facebook friend
but can I find you and meet this girl? I don't have enough crazy in my life.
(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Wed 5 May 2010, 23:23, closed)

Sure
Gaz me :)
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Thu 6 May 2010, 11:49, closed)

Let's face it mate...
...you totally let her treat you like a complete spoon - for years! And you're still not over it yet!! Sad thing is - she probably had no idea how much she was screwing you over, and would be mortified if she did.
(ShockerMocker, Wed 5 May 2010, 23:33, closed)

Erm
I'm plenty over it - just angry that I let myself be treated that way.

And she knew - I have that on good authority....

I just wanted to share the crazy with you all.
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Thu 6 May 2010, 11:49, closed)

I look forward to the link!

( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Thu 6 May 2010, 7:59, closed)

I bet she's really unhappy now
Women who start off like this (they usually have older brothers and passive dads and grow up thinking men are there to run round for them) often get very unhappy once they're in their 30s and realise that older blokes are more discerning and confident and they'll just get told to fuck off. I've known a few women like this who are really unhappy and messed up now, cos they can no longer manipulate men like they used to and they haven't learned how else to conduct themselves in a relationship.
(IHateSprouts is baking a huge pie shaped like an enormous pie, Thu 6 May 2010, 10:18, closed)

Hmm
Oddly enough, the friend that went out with her treated her really, really badly and I felt some sorrow for her over it as she really wanted it to work, but he couldn't give a shit.

(She was still friends with another friend who used to tell me about it - as did her (then) boyfriend - whether or not I wanted to know)
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Thu 6 May 2010, 11:51, closed)