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This is a question Nights Out Gone Wrong

In celebration of the woman who went out for a quiet drink with friends after work, and ended up half naked, kicking a copper in the nads and threatening to smear her own shit over hospital staff, how have your best-laid plans ended in woe?

(, Thu 24 Mar 2011, 16:02)
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This is something of a crowbar, so sue me, but I am firmly of the opinion that
People with posh voices should not use vernacular phrases for drunkeness.

I once met a terribly posh girl, who was also incredibly fit. Thus I lusted after her, right up until the moment she said, in response to my asking how she was, "Well - last night I went out with Katie and friends, and oh my god - we were completely hat-racked."
(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 11:00, 21 replies)
I believe the politically correct term is "spasticated"

(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 11:01, closed)
Michael McIntyre: the death rattle of British comedy.

(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 11:07, closed)
He's a twat. Him and his hair.

(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 11:14, closed)
You realise you've just reproduced a snippet of his HILARIOUS observational comedy act, right?

(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 12:04, closed)
What? Posh people are twats?
It's hardly news. I just thought this was noteworthy as a case-study of extreme twattishness.
(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 12:05, closed)
I was absolutely lamp shaded.

(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 13:16, closed)
Precisely.
See also: People who say "Oh. Em. Gee!"
(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 13:21, closed)
They're usually young ladies trying to get my name right in the throes of passion

(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 14:39, closed)
In mitigation,
"hat-racked" is terribly posh vernacular.
(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 11:08, closed)

I believe 'Terribly Squiffy' is preffered in polite company.
(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 11:12, closed)
"Three sails of Daddy's yacht to the wind"

(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 11:13, closed)

'So drunk that the butler had to hold my tresses back while I was nauseous in the fifth bathroom'
(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 11:16, closed)
Terribly squiffy would have been fine.
But Jesus Christ. Seriously - it all went downhill from there.
(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 11:14, closed)
Ahh, but
did you end up rooting her?
(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 11:21, closed)
Like I said - it all went downhill from there.

(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 11:28, closed)
I prefer the term squiffy and I'm as posh as Waynetta Slob.
Although I do have Balsamic vinigar in my kitchen cupboard.
(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 11:24, closed)
Yah
SOOOOOOO lashed:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=gNz-P5WMQ8w&feature=related
(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 11:37, closed)
I had far too many yoghurts last night
- I was completely mullered.
(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 11:40, closed)
Bloody hell ....

(, Tue 29 Mar 2011, 14:21, closed)
Ow yah, ai spent just about all of yeenie like, taowtally plahhstered.
They were like, the maost legendary three years in human history.
(, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 0:13, closed)
Oh god don't. Don't.
I'm having flashbacks now.

"Oh my god! It's Giles! Giiiiiiles! Over here, chum! We're about to get absolutely facking mortal!"
(, Wed 30 Mar 2011, 8:50, closed)

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