And another one...
Some people here seem to have a major spider problem. They're not my biggie (see below) but I can't claim to be exactly spider-neutral. There's a story behind this one..

Wiggly 'back in time lines'

I'm 7. It's high summer and I'm on my Auntie's farm, playing with my cousins. The sun is hot, the barn is cool. We are climbing the big stacks plastic sacks of animal feed pellet that reach nearly to the rafters. A perfect game, an idyllic scene.

Chasing me, giggling, to the top of this landscape of smooth plastic steps, my cousins were astonished to find I had seemingly vanished on reaching the summit. My lithe 7 year old frame had posted itself down a 2 foot square gap in the centre of the pile, a consequence of the way pallets were stacked by fork-lift, and I'd slid about 20 feet to the bottom of the shaft.

I was ok. Arms and bare legs scratched because of my little shorts and t-shirt combo, by the gap was so tight that my descent, though surprising, was not so rapid. After much laughter and reassurance, the older girls ran to get Uncle Gerard and a length of rope.

Alone in the tight dim space, my scratches are becoming increasingly tickly. Then my eyes adjust. I'm coated with house spiders. You saw that coming, didn't you?

They were in my long thick Irish curls. They were in my t-shirt. They were creeping up my shorts. Bare-foot I was stood in an sea of the bastards that had been pushed down by my fall. They were still absailing down into by upturned face, my ears, my nostrils, sticking to my tears. I kept my moth clamped shut. You know that dry crackling sound when you rip spiders web? Every movement I made.

I was alone and unable to move down there for the longest 10 minutes of my life. I don't remember my rescue, I must have blocked it out. There are photos of me being hosed down by my Auntie to remove them. None of my family laughs when the incident is recalled. It wasn't funny. Everyone was sicked with horror by me, haunted, wide-eyed and shaking, as adults, equally terrified of the things, tried to fight their fear of my thousand creeping, sticking passengers. No-one ran to hug the spider-child.

Apparently I did not open my mouth, not even to eat or drink, for almost two days. I did not speak for a week, catatonic, but screamed in my sleep. no-one played in the barn again, not even the boys.

I got over it, and maintain just a healthy mistrust of spiders. I don't like the hunch of their legs. But if I get a web stuck over my face....
(hahasnakes, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:26, 7 replies)

Horrific.
But beautifully told. I'm surprised anyone could get over that sort of experience, from a relating-to-spiders point of view, at least. *click*
( IHaveABadFeelingAboutThis most likely working from home on, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:33, closed)

"No-one ran to hug the spider-child"
i'm sorry, but that almost made me laugh my arse off.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 12:45, closed)

Omg Smash Monkey
"No-one ran to hug the spider-child"
I am weeping with laughter at this Tim Burton-esque line.
I love it!
(saf, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 13:00, closed)

well that would cause a phobia
Myself I've never been frit of spiders/snakes/worms/ all the other things that people get scared of.

In your case I'd say you had a well justified point though.

I thought Tim Burton too!
(Lurkaloid awarded wanking black belt on, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 13:09, closed)

This
is the stuff that nightmares are made of.

Well done on not developing a total freak out phobia after that sort of incident, defo worth a click...

and the line 'no-one ran to hug the spider-child' made me chuckle...
(Fuckarma was masturbating into your handbag, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 13:19, closed)

okay, that does it
i'm changing my sig.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 13:34, closed)

aaaah
sounds nasty

you said there were photos, any chance of a looksee, I hate spiders but have a morbid fascination and I want to see the spider child
(Katzilla Follow Me! @Kat_Zilla (I don't promise funnehs), Fri 11 Apr 2008, 15:50, closed)