More tales from the armpit of South Yorkshire
For a while, I used to get the bus to school. It just so happened that my mum got the same bus into town every morning, and far from being too-cool-for-school, I'd sit with her.

Anyway, one wintry morning, the bus was pretty packed, and a few were stood up. One person in particular was C, an older girl I knew through a friend of my mums. I noticed that she seemed to be giving the daggers at a particular lass on the bus for most of the journey.

Pointing that out to my dear old ma, she called over to C as to what was the matter.

"Hey up Mrs Scentless, I'm fine thanks..."

And that was that, mum and I returned to the conversation at hand (think it was to do with my stash of Loaded mags she'd just found the previous evening, great fun).

Until the bus stopped at the local park. At which I witnessed C sliding a rounders bat down out of her sleeve and into her hand, and proceed to smash aforementioned person repeated over the head, then burst out of the emergency exit at the back, and off into the park, obviously to ditch the weapon.

(It turned out that the spat was over the fact that the injured girl had given a blowjob to C's fella a week previous, C had found out and decided to deal out some council estate justice in the meanest way possible. The fella had a bit of a pasting too, apparently.)

There was a bit of a mess, but the girl seemed fine in the circumstances. Because of all the furore afterwards, I was late to school (rock and roll) and despite me having a top-notch and 100% true excuse, I was in detention that night for 'obvious and quite surprising lies'!

I don't know what was worse, having seen a poor girl's head caved in or having to write 'I should know better' 500 times!!!

Remember kids - violence might sound good, but remember the collateral damage...
(scentless_apprentice takes two bottles into the shower!, Thu 29 May 2008, 16:52, 5 replies)

Armpit of south Yorkshire?
Denaby?
(davywavy, Thu 29 May 2008, 16:53, closed)

Actually
Somewhere in Sheffield.
(scentless_apprentice takes two bottles into the shower!, Thu 29 May 2008, 16:58, closed)

if a teacher had given me detention
and called me a liar when i wasn't lying, there's no way on earth i'd do that detention. i'd go straight to the headmaster's office, demand that he phone my mother for verification, then demand an apology from the cheeky twunt of a teacher.

yes, i have actually done this and yes, i did get an apology.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 29 May 2008, 17:16, closed)

Ah yes, I agree but...
I bottled it.
(scentless_apprentice takes two bottles into the shower!, Thu 29 May 2008, 17:48, closed)

nice one smash monkey :D
My mother used to regularly bail me out of after school detentions. Mainly because they were always on a friday and I had piano lessons then. Man those teachers must have been frustrated.. I feel sorry for them now. But I loved it then!
(darras jeg har en grevling i hodet. Grevling, grevlang, Fri 30 May 2008, 14:05, closed)