One last one - and fuck you if it's not random - I think it was at least pretty fucking weird for all involved.
I used to go out with a girl who was an actress and artist. She invited me to one of the bits of performance art she was in (yes yes yes - she was a hippy chick, and hippy chicks are great), which was being held outside, in public.

She wouldn't tell me what it was about - only "Life, Death, and everything."

So off I go to see it. There they all are, waiting. There's quite a crowd of people waiting for it to start.

Suddenly, an older guy next to me starts plapping his lips, going a bit pale, looking terribly unwell now, and then hits the deck, clutching his chest - "FUCK!" I cry, dropping to my knees to check he's alright, "FUCK!" he's twitching and convulsing, "has anyone got a mobile 'phone?!" I ask shit shit this is not good this is not good "Anyone?!" the audience are just staring at me like so many stunned cattle "ANYONE?! ANYONE GOT A MOBILE 'PHONE THIS IS NOT GOOD!" I scream at them, "HAS ANYONE GOT A ... MOBILE ... shit .... shit ... "

... as the play started.

Fuckers.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 28 Apr 2011, 13:59, 1 reply)

I bet
she had a really hairy muff.
(username failed moderation, Thu 28 Apr 2011, 14:03, closed)

You knew her as well, eh?

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 28 Apr 2011, 14:06, closed)