"Oh, that's so in-tents!"
Ten years or so ago I was involved with a young lady with a somewhat voracious appetite for the horizontal lambada. This might be a desirable attribute in any partner, provided of course that she is blessed with a reasonable amount of decorum and judgement. Unfortunately, she possessed of neither. She also possessed the devil's own temper when she didn't get what she wanted. While sex on tap is a plus point, it's a bastard when you inevitably don't feel like it and the lady in question is throwing the mother of hissy fits in your hungover earlobe because you'd rather roll over and die than engage in athletic and gymnastic monkeysex. Bit of a double edged sword that one, really.

One lazy early September afternoon we were chilling out at a beer festival with a few friends. The weather was warm, the conversation was flowing and we were sitting in the sunshine having a thoroughly excellent time. Without any prior warning, she leaned over to me and whispered "I'm going to the tent to get changed, see you there in thirty seconds time".

A little voice in the back of my brain went "Hmmmmm...." and I dutifully followed her back to the tent, feeling rather smug at the thought of the one thing guaranteed to entice me into taking time out from all day drinking.

Sure enough, as I stuck my head into the tent I was rewarded with a very passionate kiss on the lips as a statement of intent. I rolled forward, flung my arm round her waist and pulled her closer to me as I returned her kiss and basically let nature take it's sweaty and vigourous course. Remembering her antipathy towards any kind of subtlety, I made sure I whispered a warning in her ear at the earliest opportunity.

"Sssshhhhh! We have to be quiet hun, there are other people all around us!"

Several seconds minutes of careful and considerate foreplay later (ahem), I began to get the telltale signs that she was enjoying herself very much indeed and that stopping for any reason whatsoever would be a very bad thing.

No matter, she was making sure that her normally rather vocal opinions on religion, bad language and swift arrival were stifled as she bit down on her own knuckles when she only went and did something stupid.

She took her hand out of her mouth.

She pressed her hand against the inside of the tent for support...

I still have issues with what happened next.

A friend of ours with a rather sick sense of humour who was walking past outside was alerted to what was going on and immediately grabbed hold of her hand.

Bastard.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 1 Oct 2008, 16:25, 8 replies)

On a similar note..
When at Glastonbury as a fresh-faced 18 year old, the couple in the tent next to our pitch were having rather noisy sex, my mate stood up to get beer, piroutted and landed heavily on their tent, to the accompanying sounds of air beaing squeezed from two sets of lungs.."wuuuurgh". That said, some mere seconds later, the now flattened bag od nylon with broken poles began moving up and down to the sound of grunting. 10 out of 10 for persistence, I feel.

At the same festival, a girl who had made it known she liked me proceeded to take her torch into her tent to get changed, thus producing a very fetching shadow-play for the passersby. Needless to say the profile of her naked baps projected onto the tent wall was enough incentive to persuade me to spend the rest of the weekend doing my best to push her ovaries through her ears. She never did know why I changed my mind so quickly or, indeed, why everyone else in our group kept smirking at her....bless.

Got to love tents!
(Chad, Wed 1 Oct 2008, 16:42, closed)

A similar thing once happened to me
Whilst in a tent, I was hit in the head by a football.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Wed 1 Oct 2008, 16:52, closed)

Quality again PJM!

your post (And Chad's reply) have reminded me of a time (and an old post of mine) when I got decidedly jiggy with a lusty young maiden in a tent and our quite obvious actions was viewed by the whole campsite...

only this wasn't Glasto or anywhere...it was a 'normal' family campsite, and amongst the onlookers were the girl's parents.

ah - good times
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Wed 1 Oct 2008, 16:53, closed)

I very nearly...
... pooed myself with joy upon reading this.

That is all.
( squirrels emit silent screams has updog, Wed 1 Oct 2008, 17:10, closed)

Your friend...
...gets a click.
(dxg, Wed 1 Oct 2008, 20:13, closed)