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This is a question Tightwads

There's saving money, and there's being tight: saving money at the expense of other people, or simply for the miserly hell of it.

Tell us about measures that go beyond simple belt tightening into the realms of Mr Scrooge.

(, Thu 23 Oct 2008, 13:58)
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Revenge of the Bill Payer
I have never enjoyed talking on the phone, hate it in fact, but my two younger brothers (Steve & 'Detective' Des) took to the "wha y'doin?..naffin, wha y'doin...nowt. Wha y'doin after?.. school of phone usage like drugs to ravers. This was pre cellphone, so Dad stumped up for the Bill.

Anyhow, after another 250 quid quarterly bill from BT, my Dad snapped, and...

installed a payphone...
in the house....
in our front room!!

He soon figured that he could alter the time per pound rate, ramping it up so a quid lasted for a minute. So phone conversations for my Brothers became ..

Hi.. no!! SHUTTHEFUCKUP!! I'll see you in 20 at *beeepbeeepbeep* fuckfuckFUCKFUCK!!...DAAAAAAAD! (Steve puts another 10p in) "No Spooner SHUTTHEFUCKUP!! meet at Macdonalds in twenty.. Which one? The one in *beeepbeeepbeeep* fuckfuckFUCKINGCUNT!!"

This angst and frustration was just the ticket for my Dad. TV was replaced by watching the Brothers try and cram a 20 minute conversation into 10 seconds, made more difficult because they found it difficult to be heard over the sound of my Dad pissing himself laughing at them from the sofa.

We kept the payphone for a couple of years, my Dad still says its the most fun he ever had with us.
(, Sun 26 Oct 2008, 4:55, closed)
Hes a very clever man
I admire his genius
(, Sun 26 Oct 2008, 7:12, closed)
for your Dad.
(, Sun 26 Oct 2008, 7:57, closed)
I agree
this would've worked on my lot too.
(, Sun 26 Oct 2008, 8:53, closed)
My dad also tried this trick
Brother worked for BT so he brought one home from work one day. Unfortunately for him he didn't hide the key, so I used to use the same 10p
(, Sun 26 Oct 2008, 8:08, closed)
you used to be able to buy payphones in argos
they stopped doing them a couple of years ago. It seemed a shame
(, Sun 26 Oct 2008, 13:10, closed)
I'm with your dad on this one.

(, Sun 26 Oct 2008, 14:06, closed)
Sounds great
He sounds not so much like he was tight - simply that he wanted to get some of his 250 back, and have some fun into the bargain :)
(, Sun 26 Oct 2008, 17:40, closed)
I want a payphone when my kids become teenagers
Not for the money savings, but for the sheer entertainment.
(, Sun 26 Oct 2008, 18:00, closed)
This is really good writing!

Not just amusing (and understandable), but very vivid too.

Good stuff. Well worth a click.
(, Tue 28 Oct 2008, 14:52, closed)
as the son of a skinflint father,
I say, if you cant afford children, dont fucking have them.

I would rather die alone (likely at current rate).
(, Tue 28 Oct 2008, 17:04, closed)

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