NEWSLETTER: "I HOPE THIS EMAIL FINDS YOU ILL"
This Week:
* CHALLENGE - Film Anagrams (130+ entries)
* TUBE MAP - The Great Bear, improved!
* VIDEO - Wipe out the Tories
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________ ____ __ ___
____/ _)|_ // /_/ _ | "We're shading the
___/ _ |/_ </ __/ __ | web with some sort
__/____/____/\__/_/ |_| of 2D shader"
B3ta tree-email 733 - 16th Nov 2019
Read this issue whilst humming Duran b-sides:
http://b3ta.com/newsletter/issue733
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: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE BEEN DOING THIS WEEK
Other than hiding under desk pretend to be dead
>> What if the Tube Map were people? <<
You might know The Great Bear by Simon
Patterson, it's the London tube map but filled
with significant people. However it's always
slightly frustrated Terence Eden, who didn't
like how the tube intersections didn't connect
the categories of people. So he threw a shit
load of code at it to make it actually work.
Brilliant.
https://shkspr.mobi/blog/2019/11/the-greater-bear-...
>> Wipe the Tories Out <<
"So much love from the B3ta massive, always a
pleasure to share my work, also, wipe the
Tories out!" shouts bonnie_prince_bob.
Regardless of political content, this is
weirdly compelling, and we were punching the
air and shouting in a Scottish accent by the
end. Fun.
https://b3ta.com/links/Wipe_the_Tories_Out
>> Calm down Britain <<
Matt Round writes, "Don't know if you saw my
spoof BBFC video launched on Halloween?" - nope
we didn't catch this but we're enjoying the
kittens, and look forward to Matt's next
planned work which possibly features something
rather musical.
https://vole.wtf/calm-down-britain/
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In 2020 we'll be the same distance from Free As A
Bird as the song was from the The Beatles
breaking up.
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: FESSHOLE
Your worst moments, confessed
Each day we collect your terrible musings and
publish them for the internet to judge.
Highlights this week include:
* MALICIOUS SNAPPER - "Back in the days before
digital, I would patrol Trafalgar Sq in my
lunch hour, offering to take pictures for
tourists with their own cameras. I would always
take 3 or 4 for them, encouraging different
poses, and deliberately cut their heads off in
each one."
* DUPLICITOUS CLAPPER - "I once clapped my
hands when singing 'If you're happy and you
know it clap your hands', when I was actually
feeling quite down in the dumps."
* RELUCTANT CRAPPER "I'm currently travelling
around the tyne and wear metro with a vibrating
buttplug in."
There's now 4,651 confession and 144,384 words
in Fesshole's databanks. Add some more.
https://twitter.com/fesshole
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Orinoco Flow. Best song about a menstruating Womble ever.
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: IMAGE CHALLENGE
Time Travel TV
Here's the best images from last week:
* THIS IS SPINAL TAPESTRY - this is brilliant
and not to be missed and did over 100k views on
Facebook. Thanks ((a)lexistwit.
http://b3ta.com/board/11298782
* BOB ROSS DOES CAVE PAINTING, from S4RK.
https://b3ta.com/board/11298583
* JUST A GOOD X-MEN GAG, from Varmint.
https://b3ta.com/board/11298979
* See all the other images from the 'Time
Travel TV' challenge:
https://b3ta.com/challenge/timetraveltv/popular/
>> This week: Film Anagrams <<
Yay, it's a wordy filmy challenge! Pick a film,
jumble the letters about to make new words and
photoshop the result. Over 130 entries so far.
Nice.
https://b3ta.com/challenge/filmanagrams/popular/
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Create your Marilyn Manson name by taking the
name of a saucy lady and combining it with a
murderer. E.g. Sam Fox the Ripper.
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: SITES IN BRIEF
Good content made by others (the bastards)
* FAMOUS FIVE MATHS - How old was Julian by the
final Famous Five novel? And Timmy the dog? 24
and 13, probably. This is a properly old school
bit of internet and all the more enjoyable for
it.
http://videofoundry.co.nz/ianman/laboratory/resear...
* AWFUL LIBRARY BOOKS - And a ronseal image
blog. Expertly curated.
http://awfullibrarybooks.net
* FUN SONG MIXER - extract loops from songs and
make your own mixes. Instant results.
https://unmixer.ongaaccel.jp/quickstart
* THE DARK TRUTH BEHIND PLATFORM GAMES - set
yourself aside 15 mins for this, it's worth it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch
* TINY GAMES - Games that can fit into two
tweets. Clever.
https://itch.io/jam/tweettweetjam-3
* INTERNET OUJI BOARD - Everyone put a finger
on the mouse, and summon your dead Nan into the
office.
https://rumbling-ironclad.glitch.me
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Two Paul McCartney LPs with arguably related
titles: Memory Almost Full and RAM.
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: STAR IN NEXT WEEK'S ISSUE
Make some bollocks ok?
This week we're offering ideas to corporations:
* APPLE RECORDS - Re-release the Beatles
singles in real time over 2022-2030. Collectors
would enjoy collecting, and other fans would
enjoy the constant mini media events, articles
and chat.
* BBC - Forget leaders debates, prospective
Prime Ministers should do a series of tasks
without losing cool: switch phone to a
different tariff; retrieve ball from grumpy
neighbour; submit tax return to HMRC website;
take a driving test etc.
* MCDONALDS - Happy Meals for adults. A line of
speed maybe. Bit of coke for a white Christmas.
https://b3ta.com/mailus/
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Shout out to the one person torrenting Cast's All
Change on Pirate Bay in 2019
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: PATREON THANKS
Thanking you, the best crew
* BIGGEST BROTHERS: *EUGENIE VT*, *ALEX
MORRIS*, *HEBTROCO*, *JAMES O'BRIEN*, *JAMES
PETTS*, *JON GRANT*, *KATE*, *MARK MCCREADIE*,
*MR PHIL DONNELLY*, *SHOWRAT*, *SIMON JAMES*,
*STOOBERT*, *24-7 DEATH*, *ALAN CHARLTON*,
*ALISTAIR*, *ANDREW FLEMMING*, *ANDREW WREN*,
*BEVAN JOHNSON*, *BRIAN EELES*, *CHRIS
BLAKENEY*, *CHRIS CARLINE*, *CHRIS LOCKE*,
*CRISS MORENO*, *GEORGE STEPHENSON*, *GREG
MCGOWAN*, *IAN SHEEN*, *JAIMIE VANDENBERGH*,
*JAMES CRONIN*, *JON BINSTEAD*, *MARK ADAMSON*,
*MICHAEL TRINDER*, *NAT KING COLESLAW*,
*PATRICK CATES*, *RICHARD BARCLAY*, *SIMON
NICHOLLS*, *SPAZZCAPTAIN*, *TOM DOLAN*, *WENDY
GOODE
* BIGGER BROTHERS: NICK MORGAN, LEE BURNETT,
@MATTDAWHIT, ADAM ATACK, ADAM COONEY, ADAM
INGLIS, ADAM LLOYD, ADRIAN WOODFIELD, AL
DAVIDSON, ALBION GRAY, ANDREW SCHEUBER, ANDY
ASHTON, ANDY STORRAR, ANDY TILLETT, ANDY
WEBBER, ANDY YATES`, ANNA, ANNE-MARIE SCOTT,
AUNTIESASH HAZLEWOOD, BEN BRICE, BEN WARD, BEN
WATSON, BERTIL HANSSON, BERTRAM WOOSTER, BEX
COOK, BLOSSOMSHED, BRAD GREGORY, BYRON GEOFFREY
FARROW, C BOND, CARL MORGAN, CATHERINE
MCALLISTER, CATROASTER, CHEF TWAT, CHRIS
BRANCH, CHRIS EVANS, CHRIS GARRATT, CHRIS
GOUGH, CHRIS PATERSON, CHRIS SAUNDERS, CHRIS
SHAW, CHRIS WHITWORTH, CIARÁN R, COURTENAY
FERRIS, CRAIG LIDDELL, CRAIG TONKS, CRAIG
TURNER, DAMIEN SMITH, DAN STOTT, DANIEL BROWN,
DANIEL CHOTE, DAVE NATTRISS, DAVE TICKLE, DAVID
AULT, DAVID CATLEY, DAVID GARDINER, DAVID
GREEN, DAVID KING, DAVID KNOLL, DAVID MILLS,
DEREK LAW, DEREK ROBERTS, DOMINIC HAIGH, ED CAN
DO, ED COOK, EDWARD ALMOND, EMMA LAY, ERIC VON
BORSTEL, ESSY DAVE, FAITH H. MARTIN, FEARGHAS,
FERGUS MCKAY, FIONA JAMES, FOURSTAR, FRASER
LEWRY, FUNKSTER, GAYNOR CLARKSON, GEOFF TIDEY,
GEOFFREY BALME, GEORGE PRESTON, GIA MILINOVICH,
GNEISSROCKS, GRAHAM LICENCE, GREENFOX, GREG
NEILSON, GUS NICOL, HANNAH CHUBB, HEIDI
COLTHUP, HELEN GASKELL, IAIN, IAIN BRASSINGTON,
IAIN FULLER, IAIN HENSHAW, IAIN MOFFATT, IAIN
RUXTON, IAN BEVERIDGE, IAN BOLTZ, IVAN KELLY,
JAMES CLAYTON, JAMES DONNELLY, JAMES GOLBEY,
JAMES KERRY-BARNARD, JAMES MACINNES, JAMES
O'MALLEY, JAMES PEARSON, JAMES SHAKESPEARE,
JAMIE TAYLOR, JANE BAKER, JASON STEWART, JAY
ROCHE, JAYMIE THOMAS, JERRY QUARTLEY, JIM
DABELL, JIM FRAYLING, JIM HALFPENNY, JIM
MACARTHUR, JIM WOODWARD, JOE BANNER, JOE
MCNALLY, JOE SIMMONDS, JOEY MOORE, JOHN
FARAGHER, JOHN FOSTER, JOHN HAMMERSLEY, JOHN
HIGGS, JOHN MATTHEWS, JOHNNIE SHANNON, JOHNNY
WATTERS, JONTY WAREING, JOSH MCMILLAN, JOSHUA
THOMASSON, JUDE EVANS, JUSTIN BRETT, JǏM
MCNǏVEN, KATE DEVLIN, KEV ADAMS, KONRAD
PETRUSEWICZ, LISA WESTHAVEN, LOUISE ALLEN, LUKE
MEPHAM, MARINA DE JOSLIN, MARK HIBBETT, MARK
WILSON, MARTIN BEER, MARTIN DAVIES, MARTIN
HOLLOWAY, MARTIN PEACHE, MATHEW CLAYTON,
MATSIMPSK, MATT BUCHANAN, MATT DREWRY, MATTHEW
COLLINGE, MATTHEW FORMAN, MATTHEW MORRIS,
MATTHEW WILKES, MICK CURTIS, MIDNIGHTRAMBLER,
MIKE MIDDLETON, MIL JAMIESON, MONTOCAT, NEIL DE
CARTERET, NICK ROSS, OBIW4N SHINOBI, OLIVER
BEWES, PAUL CHERRY, PAUL LEADER, PAUL SMITH,
PAUL WESTERMAN, PETER ASHTRAY, PETER COOMBE,
PETER GOSLING, PETER MCMINN, PETER WOUDA,
PHILIP KINCHINGTON, POOKONG, REBECCA MCMANUS,
RHYS WYNNE, RICH POPE, RICHARD BECKETT, RICHARD
MATTHIAS, RICK LINDLEY, RIVEN A BUCKLEY, ROB
AFFLECK, ROB MAHON, ROB VINCENT, ROBBIE LESIUK,
ROBERT HILLS, ROBIN, ROSS CARTER,
ROSSOVERTHERE, RUPERT HULL, RYAN DORAN, RYAN
RHODES, SALEEM AHMAD, SAM ANDERSON, SAM
RUSSELL, SARAH WILLIAMSON, SCOTT S. KRAMER,
SEAN CASELY, SIMON COWAN, SIMON HOLMES, SIMON
MCDOUGALL, SIMON SMITH, SIMON WATERFALL,
STARLORD MIXTAPE, STEPHEN WALLER, STEVE
ANGLESEY, STEVE LAKER, STEVE PROWSE, , STEVEN
SMITH, STEVEY GARLAND, STEWART NOLAN, STUART
ALLDRED, STUART ASHEN, TIM JOKL, TIM MOUNCER,
TIM WEAVER, TOM CRICK, TOM HEBBRON, TOM
REES-WILLIAMS, TOM RYAN, TOM WRIGHT,
TOWNSENDSPUBLISHER, TYRONNE MANN, VICKI JAKES,
WIL HADDEN, WILL GOULDEN, GAVIN TOMMEY, IAN
APPLEBY, PETE, STUART RICHARDS, TOBIE FYSH,
CARL MESNER LYONS, CHRIS JOHNSON, EMMA SYKES,
JAN SPIELHOFF, JESS BAKER, JOHN FIELD, MIKE
CONGREVE, SEAN FLANAGAN, TOM FREKE, ED ZITRON,
ADAM BEARDWOOD, DAVID STARK, ALASTAIR DODD,
ALEXANDRE STRUBE, ANDREW ROBINSON, ANDY
CANDLER, CHRIS GOODE, CONNOR PARSLOW, CRAIG
NAPLES, DAN TASSE, DANIEL MOELLER, DANNY
KODICEK, DOMINIC LE GARSMEUR, DUNCAN
STRICKLAND, HARRY, IRENE SEMANCHUK, JOSEPH
MULVANEY, JULIE BEACOCK, MARK BENSON, MICHAEL
KITT, NICKY HEWGILL, PAUL TOPPING, PETER ROYAL,
RICHARD SPEED, ROSE JOHNSON, SENTIENT MEATBAG,
TIM BEACHY
* BIG BROTHERS: Deny Coughlan, Peter Cooper,
Nick Kent, Russ Anderson, 5telios, Adam
Kaczmarek, Adam Tickner, Al Napp, Alex Wren,
Alex Wrottesley, Amy Oliver, Andrea Vail,
Andrew Harris, Andy Nattan, Andy Shirling, Ben,
Ben Chapman, ben cowell-thomas, Ben Groom, Ben
Sugden, Ben Webb, Bobod, BSG, Cat Conner,
Centuries of Sound, Chris Ward, Christina
Freeman, Claire Allen, Claire Zolkwer, Dan
Fairs, Darren John Harris, Dave The Hammer
Parry, David Bond, David Ellinor, David
Whittam, Daz Wright, Emily Payne, Emma Nicol,
Fenris Games, FuzzyFreaks, Gary Sharp, Graham
Freeman, Gwyn Fisher, Hadleigh Charles, Hugh
Noble, Iain M Barker, Ian Silvester, Ilya, Ivan
Shiel, Jace Otting, James, James Meers,
Jennifer Moquin, Jim Lucking, John Griffiths,
John M, Jon Bounds, Julie Brumlik, Lee Ball,
Louis E, Lyra Jay, Marc Lindberg, mark
madgwick, Mark Ryan, Martin Vindahl Olsen, Matt
Carr, Matt Loren, Michael Bryan, Mike Booth,
Mike Carter, Mr Flibble, Neil Ives, Nick, Nick
Murdoch, Nigel Ford, Oli, P Underwood, Paul
Bayfield, Paul Braithwaite, Paul Mancini, Paul
Slade, Peter, Peter Wood, Phil Barns, Rachel
Tougas, Richard Abraham, Richard Midwinter, Rob
Potter, Robert Purkis, Robert Simpson, Rohan,
Russell Webster, Sam Brown, Seirian Hanner,
Sham Courtney, Simon Lumb, Stephen McAuley,
Stephen Williams, Stewart C. Russell, Stéphane,
Swedemason, Tanya Kant, Ted Bowyer, Thepfy, Tim
Knight, Tim Polglase, Tom Clark, Tony East,
Victoria Wood, wigglywigglyworm, Wine School of
Philadelphia.
Written by Rob Manuel. Yes, that cunt.
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B3ta's manifesto commitments
1. Bonus / live tracks will be hidden on Spotify
unless you click an admin option
2. Tea will be called "tea" not "English
Breakfast Tea"
3. Apple will make a modern phone with the small
form factor of an iPhone SE
4. Headphone socket is coming back lads
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https://www.patreon.com/b3ta
