NEWSLETTER: "HAVE YOU EVER FUCKED A PIG? THEN PLEASE UNSUB, NO PIG-FUCKERS WANTED"
This Week:
* CHALLENGE - Might as well do the Tory leadership race
* AI NOW EXPLAINS CODE - finally something useful
* GAME(ISH) - Can you predict tossers?
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________ ____ __ ___
____/ _)|_ // /_/ _ | "We're saving the web,
___/ _ |/_ </ __/ __ | a thanks would be nice
__/____/____/\__/_/ |_| occasionally?"
B3ta email 825 - 15 Jul 2022
Read this web issue at Gopher's funeral:
http://b3ta.com/newsletter/issue825
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: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE MADE THIS WEEK
Other than making trouble outside schools again
* AI WRITING CODE EXPLAINERS - Turns out there
is a good use for AI after all, Simon Willison
writes, "Using these AIs feels more like
spellcasting than programming: no-one, not even
the creators, fully understands how they work or
what they can do and you get better at them by
accumulating weird new incantations that might
lead to better results. Or unleash demons if you
type something wrong."
https://simonwillison.net/2022/Jul/9/gpt-3-explain...
* HOW MANY COIN FLIPS CAN YOU PREDICT IN A ROW?
- "Another stupid -le game that no-one wanted.
Now you don't even have to know the alphabet! I
don't know, it's very hot and it seemed like a
good idea at the time."
https://edjefferson.com/probable/
* I MADE THESE PICTURES MOVE, JULY 2022 -
drivelsieve returns with more of his moving
pictures and writes, "Some of them didn't want
to move, but I made them do it anyway"
https://b3ta.com/links/I_made_these_pictures_move_...
* FESSHOLE INTERVIEW - Your editor has done a
long interview about his confessions project but
it takes in other stuff along the way including
being confused with Jonti Picking, and an
initially confusing digression into nonces.
https://twitter.com/AndrewGold_ok/status/154651916...
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: HEBTROCO SPONSORSHIP
Buy some fantastic jeans and shirts
You, dear discerning b3ta reader, are probably
sitting there wearing clothes that, if you were
honest about it, could be nice. But help is at
hand: Hebtroco are here to dress you from
head-to-toe with threads made in the UK to the
highest standards, so that the quality matches
the prices. Go on, treat yourself.
https://hebtro.co/
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: FESSHOLE
Your confessions shared for valueless internet
points
Each week you piss in a bin and we offer it
around going "anyone fancy a sip of this?"
* FANNY HAIR - "I accidentally got fanny hair
removal cream in my hair and ended up with a
bald patch. I told people at work I had stress
related alopecia and would be wearing a hat
until my hair had grown back. They all clubbed
together and bought me a spa day to help me
relax."
* ALEXA - "I talk to my neighbours Alexa through
his letterbox and create alarms when he's not
there. My most recent one was 'walk the dog you
lazy twat' at 3am. I fucking hate my neighbour."
* TICKETS - "I bought two tickets for my
girlfriend's birthday to go to Kings of Leon. We
broke up soon after her birthday and she started
seeing someone else, and has planned to take
him. 48 hours before the gig, I reported the
tickets as stolen."
Join the half a million people who have heard of
Fesshole, whilst knowing, you're the special
people who've also heard of B3ta:
https://twitter.com/fesshole/
Do pre-order the Fesshole book, we've nearly finished it, B3tan Dr Dunno is just working on the design as we type, and it'll be out for Christmas:
https://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/18041903...
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: SITES IN BRIEF
Liens Minitel de votre correspondant Français...
* NEVER WRITE FUN PROJECTS EVER - interesting
story explaining the trouble that can be caused
by trying to encode versions of your
ex-colleagues into bots and letting them loose
on the internal communication system.
https://gist.github.com/aconbere/1982a5eb17b778170...
* AUDIENCE CAPTURE - a neat concept explaining
how creators’ behaviour changes because of the
feedback loop. Explains a lot of what we see
online, as YouTube and social media has turned
into the most efficient system of finding the
disturbed kids at school who could be persuaded
to eat shit, by having the whole class stand
around shouting "eat shit" and clapping if they
do it.
https://gurwinder.substack.com/p/the-perils-of-aud...
* THE JOY OF HEX - Hot or Not without all the
seediness, here you must just vote on your
favourite hexadecimal colour. At the time of
writing, they've only done 0.18393397331237793%
of them, and trolls that usually find a way to
ruin any such site have not got #b00b1e or
#d11d05 ranking.
https://colorvote.io
* CHUCKLE BROS / RED DWARF CROSSOVER - We always
enjoy the incredibly niche deep dives on Dirty
Feed, and this article about the unexpected
links between ChuckleVision and Red Dwarf seems
to have done well for them. Since it will
probably only appeal to a British 40-something
comedy nerd demographic, we're sure no b3ta
readers will be interested.
https://dirtyfeed.org/2022/07/tales-scene-dock/
* CLIMB TO THE TOP - We remember being surprised
by how much problem solving was involved when we
tried climbing for the first time. This game
gives you all the brain work without any of the
health benefits.
https://torfi.itch.io/klifur
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: IMAGE CHALLENGE
Pop Holidays
Here's the best images from last week:
* Putting the joy in Joy Division from Monkeon:
http://b3ta.com/board/11370679
* Tubular water party from Nija
http://b3ta.com/board/11370750
* Hagbardsapple does the obligatory Nirvana
photoshop
http://b3ta.com/board/11370564
* See all the other images from the 'Pop
Holidays' challenge:
http://b3ta.com/challenge/popholidays/popular
>> This week: Tory Leadership Race <<
The Tories are picking a new leader, guess the
winner, make some puns from their names, design
challenges they must overcome like a Tory
Leadership Krypton Factor, b3ta up the worst
news cycle in ages.
http://b3ta.com/challenge/toryrace/popular
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: THINGS WE'D LIKE TO SEE NEXT WEEK
Ideas to spark your content production
* NETFLIX SFX/MUSIC DESCRIPTION ACCOUNT -
"Mysterious synth music playing", "Steely
resolute chords play", "Sibillant trilling",
"Dire choral vocalisations" and according to
official b3ta chum Kevin Adams the best one so
far, "Eldritch thrumming"
* THE "THE" QUIZ - Quite probably a boring quiz
idea but we've noticed that our memory for
whether brands have THE at the start is piss
poor. It's not The Faces, it's Faces. It's not
Naked Gun, it's The Naked Gun.
* M&S START SELLING ONLY THE COLIN THE
CATEPILLA'S BUTT - Colin's Colons.
Send us your stuff - we'll probably like it.
https://b3ta.com/mailus/
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: PATREON THANKS
We love all these people. Almost romantically.
*HEBTROCO* *JAMES O'BRIEN* *KATE* *MARK
MCCREADIE* *MR PHIL DONNELLY* *SHOWRAT* *SIMON
JAMES* *STOOBERT*
24-7 DEATH, ALAN CHARLTON, ALISTAIR, BRIAN
EELES, CHRIS BLAKENEY, CHRIS CARLINE, CHRIS
LOCKE, CRISS MORENO, IAN SHEEN, JAIMIE
VANDENBERGH, MARK ADAMSON, RICHARD BARCLAY,
SPAZZCAPTAIN, WENDY GOODE, NAT KING COLESLAW,
ALBERT MARSHMALLOW, DANIEL MUDFORD, CARL DENCH
Ed Zitron, Eugenie vT, Tom Dolan, Tom Wright,
lee burnett, Richard Matthias, @mattdawhit, Adam
Atack, Adam Cooney, Adam Lloyd, Adrian
Woodfield, Al Davidson, Albion Gray, Andy
Storrar, Andy Tillett, Andy Webber, Anna,
Anne-Marie Scott, Ben Watson, Bertram Wooster,
blossomshed, Carl Morgan, Catherine McAllister,
Chris Evans, Chris Shaw, Craig Tonks, Damien
Smith, Dan Stott, Daniel Brown, Dave Nattriss,
Dave Tickle, David Ault, David Catley, David
Gardiner, David King, David Mills, Derek Law,
Dominic Haigh, Emma Lay, Eric von Borstel, Faith
H. Martin, Fiona James, Fraser Lewry, Gaynor
Clarkson, Gia Milinovich, Greg Neilson, Gus
Nicol, Iain, Iain Brassington, Iain Fuller, Iain
Ruxton, Ian Beveridge, Ivan Kelly, James
Donnelly, James Kerry-Barnard, Jane Baker, Jason
Stewart, Jerry Quartley, Jim Dabell, Jim
Frayling, Jim MacArthur, Jim Woodward, Joe
McNally, Joe Simmonds, John Faragher, John
Foster, John Hammersley, John Matthews, Jude
Evans, Jm McNven, Kate Devlin, Kev Adams, Konrad
Petrusewicz, Martin Beer, Martin Holloway,
Martin Peache, matsimpsk, Matt Buchanan, Matt
Drewry, Matthew Collinge, Matthew Forman,
Matthew Morris, Matthew Wilkes, midnightrambler,
mil jamieson, Neil de Carteret, Nick Ross,
OBiW4N SHiNOBi, oliver bewes, Paul Cherry, Paul
Smith, Paul Westerman, Peter Ashtray, Peter
Coombe, peter wouda, Philip Kinchington,
pookong, Rich Pope, Richard Beckett, Rob Mahon,
Rob Vincent, Robbie Lesiuk, Ross Carter,
RossOverThere, Saleem Ahmad, Scott S. Kramer,
sean casely, Simon Cowan, Simon Holmes, Simon
McDougall, Simon waterfall, Stephen Waller,
Steve Anglesey, Steven Smith, Stuart Ashen, Tim
Jokl, Tim Mouncer, Tim Weaver, Tom Crick, Tom
Rees-Williams, Tom Ryan, TownsendsPublisher, Wil
Hadden, Will Goulden, AuntieSash Hazlewood,
Byron Geoffrey Farrow, Chef Twat, Chris Gough,
Chris Whitworth, Craig Turner, Daniel Chote,
Fergus McKay, fourstar, Geoff Tidey, Geoffrey
Balme, Graham Licence, James Macinnes, John
Higgs, Jonty Wareing, Mick Curtis, Rhys Wynne,
Rob Affleck, Chris Saunders, George Preston,
James O'Malley, Martin Davies, Mike Middleton,
Bex Cook, Hannah Chubb, Ben Ward, James Pearson,
Shane McHugh, Stevey Garland, Ciarn R, Craig
Liddell, Helen Gaskell, Christopher Orr, Will
Moody, Nick Morgan, Ben Brice, David Green,
Justin Brett, Louise Allen, Robin, Gavin Tommey,
Stuart Richards, Tobie Fysh, Pete, Carl Mesner
Lyons, Chris Johnson, Emma Sykes, Jan Spielhoff,
Mike Congreve, Sean Flanagan, Tom Freke, Sam
Anderson, Jess Baker, Adam Beardwood, David
Stark, Julie Brumlik, Alastair Dodd, Alexandre
Strube, Andrew Robinson, Andy Candler, Connor
Parslow, Craig Naples, Daniel Moeller, Duncan
STrickland, Harry, Irene Semanchuk, Joseph
Mulvaney, Michael Kitt, Nicky Hewgill, Paul
Topping, peter royal, Richard Speed, Sentient
Meatbag, Tim Beachy, Dominic Le Garsmeur, Mark
Benson, Danny Kodicek, Deny Coughlan, Nick Kent,
Russ Anderson, Adam Kaczmarek, Andrea Vail, Andy
Shirling, Ben Chapman, ben cowell-thomas, Ben
Groom, Ben Sugden, Cat Conner, Centuries of
Sound, Claire Allen, Claire Zolkwer, Darren John
Harris, Dave The Hammer Parry, David Bond, David
Ellinor, Daz Wright, Emily Payne, Emma Nicol,
FuzzyFreaks, Gary Sharp, Gwyn Fisher, Hugh
Noble, Iain M Barker, Ilya olak-Anti, Jennifer
Moquin, Jim Lucking, John M, Jon Bounds, Lee
Ball, Louis E, Lyra Jay, Marc Lindberg, mark
madgwick, Matt Carr, Michael Bryan, Mr Flibble,
Neil Ives, Nick, Nigel Ford, Oli, Paul Bayfield,
Paul Slade, Peter Wood, Phil Barns, Rachel
Tougas, Richard Abraham, Richard Midwinter,
Robert Purkis, Robert Simpson, Rohan, Sam Brown,
Seirian Hanner, Sham Courtney, Simon Lumb,
Stephen McAuley, Stewart C. Russell, Stphane,
Swedemason, Ted Bowyer, Thepfy, Tim Polglase,
Tom Clark, Tony East, wigglywigglyworm, Adam
Tickner, Al Napp, Andrew Harris, Bobod, Chris
Ward, Jace Otting, James Meers, John Griffiths,
Paul Mancini, Rob Potter, Tanya Kant, Victoria
Wood, Graham Freeman, Caroline Kahn, Matt.
EDITORIAL THANKS: Monkeon & Matt Round
additional links; HappyToast for image challenge
help; and Dr Dunno for extra support. Proofing
by Kat E. Thanks Kat. (You’re welcome - Kat)
And thank you to newish Patreons Ben Rout, Tim
Clarke, Simon Balch, Clemence Saussez, Derek
Colley. Martin Pritchard, Stephanie Wissinger,
Dion Ashton and Paul Blanchard. Thanks to EVEN
NEWER ONES: Fadgebadger, Mark (Mavis), Joshua
Rackstraw, Mike Stringer, Eliot Beer, Harri
Bionic, Chris Lindley, Stuart B, Jon Morris
Smith, Daniel Malbon, James Heaver and Phil
Lovell. And further thanks to newer ones: Ben
Oliver, James Wise, Claire Turner, Omnipiss,
Lindsay Mclaughlin, Mellyfish, Simon Edwards,
Dave Wong & Stafford Lawrence. NEWEST - special
love to NEW PATREON Phillip Spowart. NEW NEWSEST
- extra love love love to si Jobling & Daniel
Calvin. And bonus new love to Douglas Pennant,
Roy Santos & Will Thompson. We love you. OH GOD,
and more bonus love to Alex Collin-Oakley, Phil
McGuire & Paul Blanchard - you sexy people. And
Mike Powell and Damion Brown and Ross Carter and
PJ. Ooooh and John Daly. Oooh oooh ooh and Rich
Corcoran. Love you. And a special thank you to
the super generous Paul Topping. And a thank you
to the return of Carlos Fandango. Much
appreciated Carl. OOH AND NEW ONES! Alistair
Murray Swodeck, nevillebartos, Blargity Blarg
Blarg. YAY! Oh and more thanks to Ian Walker,
Attila Eros, Calanish and Mike Wolcom. WE LOVE
YOU. And new new thanks to Dale Goodall, Gillian
Parrot, Albion Gray & Gary Alan Norton. Thank
you, you kind humans.
And do please donate as you get occasional
"bonus" content. Maybe.
https://www.patreon.com/b3ta
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: I'M SORRY I'VE WRITTEN A JOKE
Porcupine From Purgatory apologises this week
How does Bob Marley like his doughnuts?
He doesn't - he's dead.
https://b3ta.com/questions/imsorryivewrittenajoke/...
