Scaring the God Botherers
Whilst dossing at university, three of us were sitting around watching videos in the afternoon, drinking beer, as was our usual routine in the early nineties. Anyway, there was a knock at the door, and we peeked round the curtains (checking it was not Mr Singh the land lord), and saw what was obviously two bible punchers. Being bored, we decided to have a laugh....

I open the door as normal and let them in, claiming to be extremely interested in discovering Jesus and my personal salvation. Sitting them down on the only two chairs in my room, I head off to the kitchen to make some tea before our big chat on religion.

Whilst "making tea" my mate Karl strips down to his underpants, squirts tomato sauce all over his head, face and body, before writing "I love Satan" on his chest with a marker pen. He then grabs a large carving knife, and heads back into my room to sit on the floor in front of the god squad boys, refusing to speak and staring at them in a sinister fashion.

Next my mate Gary, who has been upstairs slipping into stockings and suspenders, bra and panties (allegedly from a "Gender Bender" party at one of the halls of residence) minces in, sitting next to Karl, looking up at the bible thrashers in his lingerie.

In the meantime, I quickly use half a dozen old cardboard boxes to construct a "Devil Robot" costume, including "helmet" made of a box with eye holes cut in it, Devil Robot written on the chest, 666 on the helmet and so on. I then struggle back into my room in the robot costume, carrying a tray of tea and biscuits.

We all continue as if nothing is unusual, and I ask them to tell us more about God. As you may well imagine, the jesus creepers look more than a little unnerved, being faced with a satanic knife murderer, a transvestite and a devil robot. Fair play to them though, they finished their tea (fairly quickly), chucked us a couple of leaflets and fucked off.

We were cracking up afterwards imagining them recounting their experience to the other disciples back at the altar boy shagging clinic.

Surely, hellbound for us.....
(Mandrill, Fri 12 Dec 2008, 2:05, 1 reply)

Devil Robot..
Wasn't there a picture floating around on the board a while back? I remember the 666 on it!

Tell me it was you.
(AndyC4m Eject Eject [><], Fri 12 Dec 2008, 14:55, closed)