Don't write your own wedding vows....
Planning a wedding is a very girl orientated thing.... everything seems to have hidden significance, hidden repurcussions & hidden costs.

So among the many other things going on, in the interests of making things as pain free as possible, I went along with the idea of writing our own wedding vows.

Now if like me you were the person who spent the night before the assignment deadline writing that essay then I recommend you avoid this idea at all costs!

As there we were in the hotel, night before my wedding day, and I've still not written the vows.... Except you can't apply student assignment logic to this situation for a number of reasons;

1 - There are exactly 6,147 tasks outstanding to be done by morning; including (but by no means limited to) decorating the room, chair layout, table decorations, placecards etc etc etc

2 - EVERYONE of your/her relatives that arrives at the hotel immediately wants to stop and chat to you for 20 mins about some obscure relative who couldn't make it (who?!?) or a wedding which took place before you were born (it was so lovely they said).

3 - Your so called "mates" are dying to get you drunk by topping up your drink or toasting anything they can.

4 - You're shitting a brick and CANNOT focus at all.


So readers, that is how I came to be sat attempting to write my wedding vows just hours before my wedding. Stressed is not the word.

Some might say that 2 years in the planning could have given me ample warning and preparation time, but somehow this is a task which requires a certain mood and it just hadn't been there.... for 2 years.

Perhaps the 7 years of engagement before hand may have been ample time you ask? Nope, there is a reason I was engaged for 7 years and this fateful day was it seems not it.

So you may be happy to hear that my literary skills turned out speech to be proud of. Even the hotel receptionist girl (who was uncomfortably dishy for my wedding day) went starry eyed and shed a tear as she typed it up for me.

The ceremony went off without a hitch and by lunchtime I was married.

So you might not be surprised to learn that after just under a year of me being walked all over the ex did me a favour and went off shagging some other bloke she pulled on a night out. It wasn't for lack of trying to make it work on my part though. After a few months of utter depression I've now met a new girlfriend who thinks the world of me.

Lesson learnt: If you're putting something off for that long, chances are you don't want it!
(golddust QOTW now revolves around being a cunt, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 9:44, 4 replies)

If it's any consolation
Mrs Overlord and myself wrote our wedding speech the night before. We ended up with it in different colour pens on the same sheet of paper that we passed between us during the speech.

My best man also had an attack of nerves on the day and couldn't speak, so we had to get a friend to do one on the spot.
( DrPrunesquallor is determined to post more as of, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 10:50, closed)

Brilliant conclusion!
*click*
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 12:14, closed)

However
New girlfriend have only been dating a bit over a month but it feels totally natural, no effort at all and we're already talking moving in together, marriage the works!

My mind says it's very quick but I can't fault the relationship!
(golddust QOTW now revolves around being a cunt, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 16:19, closed)

TYotally agree!
I had a GF I was with for 5 years, spoke of moving in, managed it a couple of times and I moved back out (arguments and the like)

We finished and I met the current Lady Karma and we're already talking about looking for a place, it's only been 8 months, weird!
(Fuckarma was masturbating into your handbag, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:31, closed)