Tramp Sex
Fellow QOTW-virgin Lampito has undone what 12 months of drinking and cynicism did to me - made me remember my ex-boyfriend, and a blunderful occurence of public secks from a few years back.

He lived in quite a nice area near the harbour, and had the fortune to have a massive back garden. It had enough room for two goalposts, two BBQs, a swing set, a climbing frame, the guinea pig hutch and the crowning glory: a twelve-foot trampoline.

At this point we were foreplaying it up in his room when all of a sudden we both looked out of the window, and obviously got the same idea (fools seldom differ, eh?). The fences around his garden were big enough not to traumatise the neighbours and I was wearing a big flowy summer dress, so holding each others' hand and giggling like schoolkids we headed for the trampoline.

Missionary first, which was fine and dandy and a lot more comfy than your average bedroom floor, then he insisted I get on top. Here you can almost see it going wrong.

It woud have been fine if the little shit hadn't decided that what I needed was a 'helping hand' and walloped the trampoline with his arms "to help me bounce better". I practically shot off of his crotch like a rocket, arced gracefully over the side of the trampoline and landed clear on my back right next to the guinea pigs, legs in the air.

I was obviously in a lot of pain and sat there crying a bit, while the bastard rolled around laughing. I think for me that was the beginning of the end there, I did start to hate him soon afterwards (didn't stop me shagging him though. Stupid, stupid Nectar.)

Appy polly logies for length - it's my first time.
(theneet began to cut her hair and long for balls, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 11:18, 7 replies)

Ouch!
Funny though!
( SpankyHanky, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 11:26, closed)

Hee hee...

By your title, I thought this post was going to be about you having a portion with an actual 'tramp', as in 'vagrant'...

Then I pondered...in America, would that be known as 'bum sex'?

Then I lost my train of thought.

Good story though. *clicks*
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Wed 29 Apr 2009, 11:44, closed)

Actually...
I've actually had sex with a vagrant.

To my credit, she was young, attractive and female (and recently showered), but she was indeed a hobo/tramp/bum/vagrant.

I'd post the story in full, but we never had sex in public, so...
(TheManWhoWas SlightlyKnackered, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 16:19, closed)

It could have been worse...
...I thought you were going to say you landed on his cock, snapping it in the process
(Monkey the Chicken Twitter: death_stairs, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 12:43, closed)

Guinea pigs
For some reason, their presence in this tale gave it a nice homely feel for me. I'm concerned about what this means.

*click*
( TheMagicDwarf is back like ballroom dancing, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 12:46, closed)

Yay! Replies! *snuggle*
I was just glad I didn't land on the poor buggers. They did make a terrified racket though.

I wish I had snapped his cock though, would've done the world a good service...
(theneet began to cut her hair and long for balls, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 16:01, closed)

I'm sure it's different when it happens...
But I'd be laughing my ass off too, especially if I were the one who fell off the trampoline!
(TheManWhoWas SlightlyKnackered, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 16:00, closed)