Family Ex-mas
As much as I was fond of my ex's immediate family, I found Christmas with his aunty, uncle and cousins... well "uncomfortable" shall we say? It should have been quite enjoyable - they had an amazing house, were very generous and jolly most of the time, but there was a weird tension of competitiveness and parenting choices that I couldn't help thinking would make for major issues in the future.

The youngest son had been conditioned into cheating at family games. Any time he overheard an answer and repeated it he would be praised for being a clever boy. There was no questioning the fact that he'd answered with an obscure song title from before he was born or even any suggestion that he might have just been lucky at guessing. Though I am no behaviourist I couldn't help feeling that this might generate some "win at all cost" mentality that could get him in trouble in the future.

The daughter was likewise praised for her singing voice, which might have been good if she'd have put some effort into training it. Instead she was deemed a natural and encouraged to go on a TV show to showcase her skills. Although there was no suggestion she should try to develop her vocal talents, there WERE areas that she was deemed to need help - her mother mentioned that she had recently sourced her some "slimming pills" to help her manage her weight. This (again in IMO) seemed to be setting her up for a future of over-estimating her talents and being over-critical of her appearance - a perfect storm you might say.

The eldest son was a bit of a stoner kid and the best of the lot, but he basically just kept his head down and allowed the madness and judgements to wash over him. In many ways I don't blame him.

As for me, I survived the ultra-competitive minefield of festive games by teaming up with the Grandad. We weren't ever going to win, but at least no one was shouting "HA!" aggressively in our faces when we got a question wrong.
( e.m.m.y. foxtrot uniform charlie kilo india tango, Thu 17 Dec 2015, 12:38, Reply)