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- a member for 21 years, 8 months and 29 days
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» World's Sickest Joke
a few from my fone
that i keep getting sent, again apologies if any of them have already made it onto this!
My dick is big
Her ass is tight
I poked her anus with delight
But halfway there i hit a bump
The bitch forgot to take a dump
********
3 holymen on a sinking ship at sea.
The minister shouts " save the children!!". The rabbi shouts " fuck the children!!", the priest shouts: " Do we have time?"
********
Man goes to the doctor after being raped by an elephant. The Dr says " funny, your ass is 10 inches wide but an elephants cock is only 3 inches wide!" To which the man replies " well the bastard fingered me first"
********
Due to the success of the last cockle picking trip, the invite is extended to pakis, wogs, gays and chavs.
********
and finally....
The US police dept. were said to be quite happy that Michael jackson dangled his little boy over a balcony. One officer said " normally he just tosses them off,"
(Tue 14th Sep 2004, 20:06, More)
a few from my fone
that i keep getting sent, again apologies if any of them have already made it onto this!
My dick is big
Her ass is tight
I poked her anus with delight
But halfway there i hit a bump
The bitch forgot to take a dump
********
3 holymen on a sinking ship at sea.
The minister shouts " save the children!!". The rabbi shouts " fuck the children!!", the priest shouts: " Do we have time?"
********
Man goes to the doctor after being raped by an elephant. The Dr says " funny, your ass is 10 inches wide but an elephants cock is only 3 inches wide!" To which the man replies " well the bastard fingered me first"
********
Due to the success of the last cockle picking trip, the invite is extended to pakis, wogs, gays and chavs.
********
and finally....
The US police dept. were said to be quite happy that Michael jackson dangled his little boy over a balcony. One officer said " normally he just tosses them off,"
(Tue 14th Sep 2004, 20:06, More)
» Impromptu Games You Play
name game
rules are simple:
Name a famous person, for example Brad Pitt, then the next person has to think of another famous person beginning with the letter of the surname ( so it would be P- so u could say Penelope Cruz) thus it continues round the table.The twist is that you must be drinking whilst thinking , if you are caught not doing this you have to down your drink. If you cant think of a name you down again. ( basically its a win -win situation to getting pissed, which quite often i am after a game of this.)
Another one... which we played in school, cant remember the name, but it involved seeing how many arses you could rest the palm of your hand on. this mainly involved walking behind unsuspecting person really closely and then just resting your hand and trying to keep up with them in the corridor.
extra points for someone of the same sex, ugly people, length of time etc
extra extra points were given to members of staff. Even had a " you cant touch someone whos touched you " rule had to be established and pinned up on the sixth year noticeboard.
And to think it was a group of 5 girls who started this game. god we were bored at school.
(Mon 29th Mar 2004, 18:49, More)
name game
rules are simple:
Name a famous person, for example Brad Pitt, then the next person has to think of another famous person beginning with the letter of the surname ( so it would be P- so u could say Penelope Cruz) thus it continues round the table.The twist is that you must be drinking whilst thinking , if you are caught not doing this you have to down your drink. If you cant think of a name you down again. ( basically its a win -win situation to getting pissed, which quite often i am after a game of this.)
Another one... which we played in school, cant remember the name, but it involved seeing how many arses you could rest the palm of your hand on. this mainly involved walking behind unsuspecting person really closely and then just resting your hand and trying to keep up with them in the corridor.
extra points for someone of the same sex, ugly people, length of time etc
extra extra points were given to members of staff. Even had a " you cant touch someone whos touched you " rule had to be established and pinned up on the sixth year noticeboard.
And to think it was a group of 5 girls who started this game. god we were bored at school.
(Mon 29th Mar 2004, 18:49, More)