b3ta.com user Rev. Otana
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» Lies Your Parents Told You

When I was in primary school
our teachers were doing a sociology experiment and told us that there was a fatal, highly contagious disease in the school and we'd been quarantined and wouldn't see our families again. They then told us to write letters to our friends and families "on the outside".

It backfired when most of the kids panicked and burst into tears before they could do any work. Everyone spent the whole day scared shitless thinking they wouldn't see their families again.

We were eight at the time.
(Tue 20th Jan 2004, 19:17, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

What do they call abortions in the Czech Republic?
A cancelled Czech.

(Thu 9th Sep 2004, 21:24, More)

» Clients Are Stupid

Actually, this is the other way around ...
I was attempting to configure M2 to use as my default mail client and couldn't figure out how to set up the SMTP authentication. So after rooting through Opera and BT's help files I finally caved in and called BT myself.

Me: Hi, I want to use an e-mail client other than Outlook Express and I can't seem to find any literature on it on your site. Is this a case of BT Openworld not working with non-Microsoft programs or can I get any help from you?

Tech Support: Uh ... what's an e- mail client?

Me: ....... *hangs up*

And yes, I worked it out about ten minutes later. But seriously ...
(Mon 29th Dec 2003, 15:02, More)

» Have you ever been dumped in a spectacular way?

When I was in Sixth Form
I had to go to a Church of England school for my drama A-level 'cause my school didn't offer it. Being a Pagan, I decided not to hide my religious status, but simply tuck my pentacle away and not make a big deal about it.

I started seeing this guy Dan and was pretty besotted with him (as you are at that age) and suddenly, two weeks later, he tells me he doesn't want to see me anymore. He still loves me and thinks I'm great, but I'm "going to dance in Hell with Satan" (said in the cheeriest, nicest voice possible). I kicked him in the nuts and told him to get out of my house.

Made me nervous to go back to a Christian school, but when everyone found out what happened no one would talk to him for being such a intolerant cnut. Yay.
(Fri 18th Jun 2004, 13:15, More)

» Slang Survey

Mad as a window
I don't know how mad a window really is, but it's amusing nontheless.
(Sun 1st Feb 2004, 14:16, More)
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