b3ta.com user Idid
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Recent front page messages:


(Fri 5th Aug 2005, 15:42, More)

This is ze wrong painting

(Mon 23rd Aug 2004, 11:52, More)


(Wed 11th Aug 2004, 15:58, More)

(Fri 6th Aug 2004, 14:19, More)


(Fri 2nd Jul 2004, 11:22, More)

How do those detector vans work?
(Tue 18th May 2004, 19:10, More)

Great shot kid....
If you see a Red-Ex blame Pipex
...that was one in a million!
Happy Star Wars Day
(Tue 4th May 2004, 21:13, More)

(Mon 15th Mar 2004, 10:28, More)

Bird Flu

(Sat 31st Jan 2004, 12:18, More)

He's excited about something

(Wed 28th Jan 2004, 2:19, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Best Comebacks

In the 5th form at school...
I was pissing around in the corridor, repeatedly pinging the school bell, which was quite high up on the wall.
After a while a balding, elbow-patched teacher came out of a nearby classroom and started yelling

"You, boy! Stop that! You should know better at your age.
You don't see the first years doing that do you?"

to which I replied, completely deadpan,

"No Sir... the first years can't reach it."

Clearly outwitted and humiliated, he went back into his classroom.
(Thu 29th Apr 2004, 22:37, More)

» Teenage Poetry

Not sure what my hormones were doing...
Oh, to be a daffodil
And feel the warmth of spring,
Verily now 'tis witching hour
And the dead of night draws in.
So gather crumpets, cauldron, fish
With music loud and shrill
And into yellow scented bloom
Transform at once, you will.
(Fri 12th Aug 2005, 10:03, More)

» Have you ever been rude to a celebrity?

Noel Gallagher
Not so much rude as cheeky...
I was in a pub in London a couple of years ago and spotted Noel Gallagher sitting with his girlfriend and some hangers on.

I went over and asked him for his autograph.

He kindly obliged.
Then I said "You couldn't spare a cigarette too, could you?"
His mates started going, "you come over here and interrupt our conversation and ask for his autograph and now you want a fag!"
He thought about it briefly and said "go on then!" and offered me a B+H!

I smoked it and kept the butt as a souvenir!

Surprisingly nice bloke!
(Fri 16th Apr 2004, 13:46, More)