b3ta.com user GrandmaOfShoes
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Profile for GrandmaOfShoes:
Profile Info:

"you dance around your room and play guitar and get naked and stuff like that :):)

"and climb rocks big and small, and hit people with sticks whilst shouting a bit loud

"and tell me to call you a wanker and then get offended when i do"
- A girl talking about me.

Recent front page messages:

those crazy go-getters!

(Fri 13th Jul 2007, 20:52, More)

and so I can finally rest
enjoy... I know I did*

click anything for bigger

*now it's finished
(Wed 31st Aug 2005, 23:22, More)

Definitely got my ticket for this one

(Fri 27th May 2005, 12:05, More)


wish i hadn't spent so much time on something that looks so crap
(Fri 11th Mar 2005, 1:04, More)

OH NO....


...they came back!
(Sat 22nd Jan 2005, 14:30, More)

large me up!

(Mon 19th Jul 2004, 17:37, More)

I bought Mary an SG

(Sun 13th Jun 2004, 12:04, More)

you brought it on yourself

(Mon 31st May 2004, 15:18, More)

I'm so very sorry

/stops listening to less than jake
(Thu 20th May 2004, 15:07, More)

when her mother told her not to become an opera singer she soon forgot

woo FP
(Wed 11th Feb 2004, 12:38, More)

G That Hurts

Woo FP thanks :)
(Wed 10th Sep 2003, 21:40, More)

Best answers to questions:

» DIY disasters

This is a normal post i am a heron. i haev a long neck and i pick fish out of the water w/ my beak. if you dont repost this comment on 10 other pages i will fly into your kitchen tonight and make a mess of your pots and pans

(Sat 5th Apr 2008, 23:57, More)

» Fancy Dress

well all mine are originally very sexy 'til I got into them
Sexy Fairy
Sexy Tiki Girl
sexy beaten housewife
(Fri 13th Jan 2006, 16:02, More)

» Shame

this happened not so long ago
I was being a right little booze-hound with my mates a few weekends ago, I'd taken a week worth of kebab money and spent it on a train fare home to go on the lash with them for a mate's birthday.

After lots of the boozing we got to our final destination, a nouveau straight lined rock/indie/alt club, and that's when I see her, a perfectly proportioned girl who only reached my elbow's (I'm 6' which would make her about 3'10ish), I know for a fact one of my friend's is horrifically afraid of small people, cue me scheming. My plan was to pull her and dangle her over my mate's bed in the morning...

I managed to get her interested in me, and she got up on the stage so she could reach me to kiss me, when she dipped in drunken logic stepped in and my mind screamed "FUCKING HELL SHE'S 12" I ran away screaming, literally screaming according to several less pissed mates.

Now I'm pleased to tell you she wasn't twelve as everyone at the door is ID'd however I'm not pleased to tell you the shame I feel for probably ruining the tiny girl's evening

still if she's gonna get herself interested in me, she really is selling herself short
(Mon 28th Nov 2005, 10:55, More)

» Why I was late

I wasn't I was early
look at me I'm sad and I got the first reply

when I'm late for work it's usually because I'm avoiding going in, if that's the case my boss will ask "why are you late?" to which I reply "because I hate my job" he laughs, I walk away. Simple.
(Thu 28th Jun 2007, 10:38, More)

» Booze Related Disasters

one night after an exceedingly heavy drinking session i was wandering with my mate through a cemetary when suddenly a voice called something along the lines of "oi you, do you want a fight" being drunken i fumbled for words and failed miserably to stop the onslaught.... i can't remember much for a while after that only thing i can remember is waking up and having the silhouette of a gravestone above my head.... "argh i'm dead" i believe was my exact statement, after about half an hour of not seeing anyone (it was 3 in the morning) i assumed i really was dead, and set about becoming a poltergheist, i ran round for about half an hour looking for a victim to sneak up on and tap there shoulders.... finally i found my victim, running up behind them i pounced and tapped them lightly on the shoulder. "who the heck are you?" they replied... realising i wasn't dead i kind of had a huge sense of happiness and merrily skipped down the road... needless to say i had a headache the next 24 hours
(Fri 19th Mar 2004, 2:40, More)
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