» World's Sickest Joke

Joey Deacon goes up to an ice-cream van,
and says "MUUURGH! I WANT AN ICE CREAM!"
"Raspberry Ripple?" asked the ice cream man;
"YEAH," replied Joey: "AND I'M A SPASTIC TOO! UUUUUUUURM!"

*flails arms wildly in search of coat*
(Tue 3rd Jan 2006, 16:43, More)

» Jobsworths

My mum was wanking me off with my headphones
which were covered in chilli, while she was having a cup of tea in the back of an ice cream van.
(Fri 13th May 2005, 16:45, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

What have George Best and Gary Glitter got in common?
They both enjoyed the occasional tot.
/coat
(Mon 12th Dec 2005, 17:42, More)

» Have you ever been dumped in a spectacular way?

Oh dear, oh dear....
The worst time I was ever dumped was on my 14th birthday, back in secondary school. My girlfriend at the time wrote me a note saying something on the lines of: "It's not working out, I don't want to shag you, you're too dirty for me." So I, enraged by this, wrote her a note back, which went something along the lines of "Well fuck you you stupid whore, all I wanted was a suck. You are a boring bitch. At least you put some money in my birthday card. I hate you."

What I didn't count on was her telling everybody what was in the note, so my immensley short-sighted behaviour led me to be hated by almost all the girls, destroying my future chances with them.

The fucking cranberry.
(Fri 18th Jun 2004, 15:25, More)