b3ta.com user northern seth
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Hmm, now driving 25 miles to work every day over the flatty goodness of lincolnshire (until i hit the wolds then its hilly goodness)
I have bought somewhere with more than 1 floor (yay. We also seem to have acquired 2 dogs.

Recent front page messages:


Best answers to questions:

» World's Sickest Joke

dunno if this has already been said...
but here goes...

whats the difference between paula radcliffe and Hitler?

At least Hitler tried to finish a race
(Fri 10th Sep 2004, 9:53, More)

» My most gullible moment

I once managed to convince the wife...
that there was an ancient chinese philosopher called Hu Man Pu

More will follow
(Thu 21st Aug 2008, 20:33, More)

» Irrational Fears

A guy i used to work with called John,
absolutely top bloke, ex army engineer right good laugh. But he had a fear of dwarfs. Apparently he went to see time bandits without knowing what it was about and had to leave in the first 5 minutes. Plus he started to sweat when he saw one get on the same train as him.
(Tue 27th Jan 2004, 16:09, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

Whats the best thing...
about fucking twenty-eight year olds?

There's 20 of them

I'm ere all week. Try the fish
(Tue 6th Dec 2005, 14:39, More)

» Stupid Tourists

On a family holiday in spain...
about fourteen years ago now, we were staying a mate of my dads villa in classy Marbella. Now the sink upstairs didn't have a plug due to the spanish apparentley liking to wash in running water.

Dad doesn't like it, Dad wants a plug, so one morning the folks head into town, leaving my sister and me back at the villa to lounge around. Several hours later, my mum staggers through the door in hysterics closely followed by one sheepish looking pops.

What had transpired was they had inded found a hardware shop, and my dad not speaking a word of spanish and the spanish hardware shop owner not speaking a word of english, had spent an HOUR trying to ask for a plug, even with the aid of diagrams. My dear old dad either through frustration or sheer linguistic genius (bearing in mind he's born and bred Yorksher) resorts to adding an o onto the end of words to make it sound spanish. Hence my dad says "please-o can I have-o a plug-o, senor". Genius

While he was ther he did manage to buy a metal lawn sprinkler thing (wtf?!) which went into his hand luggage on the way back. Hand luggage goes through X-ray machine, lawn sprinkler looks like a cross between a gun and a huge knife. Well done dad. Now can you imagine how the following conversation with the officials went?

There are loads more of these from this one particualr trip. It was the funniest two weeks ever
(Thu 14th Jul 2005, 10:33, More)
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