b3ta.com user Monskervator the Monsk
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Profile for Monskervator the Monsk:
Profile Info:

I have been known on occasion to bite.
I can, on occasion be bothered to actually do things... after reading the page for over a year I finally decided to take the plunge & join

This is a poor picture of me
although there are not too many I allow to be taken (other peoples faces are blacked out due to them being cranks and having null publicity clauses in their friendship contracts)

This page will/may be updated... if I can be bothered :)

Recent front page messages:


Best answers to questions:

» Clients Are Stupid

Mobile Phones confuse some people...
I had a customer call to say they wanted to disconnect their mobile as it was too expensive,
ME "ok, do you think your talkplan is too high?"
HIM "No"
ME "so what are you finding expensive?"
HIM "The batteries, I am switching my phone off after every call I make, but the batteries run out within a month & it was too expensive to keep buying new ones!"
(He added that he had so far bought 3 batteries at a cost of about £50 a piece.)
ME (biting lip) "are you aware that the batteries are rechargeable?... that's why we supply a charger."
HIM "Shit"
The line went dead
(Wed 31st Dec 2003, 18:04, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

why is Helen Kellers Guide dog depressed
so would you be if you were called Mmmuunnnnnggggh

How many hands does Helen Keller use to masturbate?
one, she uses the other to moan

what is Helen Kellers favourite colour?
(Sun 12th Sep 2004, 0:57, More)

» Clients Are Stupid

I got a call
from a customer asking me where his phone was.
Confused I said "your phone?"
"My mobile," he continued, "I'm on your network and I have lost my phone, now where is it?"
I attempted to explain that I had no idea where his phone was but he interjected "well you know where it is to send my bloody phone calls to it!"
What can you say to that?!
(Fri 2nd Jan 2004, 20:46, More)

» Useless Information

Native British Languages are...
Languages in the United Kingdom

British Sign Language, Makaton, Cornish, English (British English),Cant,Cockney rhyming slang, English English, Estuary English, Polari, Scottish English, Irish, Irish Sign Language, Romany, Scots, Doric, Glaswegian, Hiberno-Scots, Ulster Scots, Scottish Gaelic, Welsh

Historic (dead Languages)
Anglo-Norman, Breton, Cumbric, Ivernic, Latin, Old English, Old Norse, Norn, Pictish, country Brythonic

So now you know!
(Sat 19th Mar 2005, 16:22, More)

» Useless Information

gets most of its "quirky" news stories direct from internet chain letters!
(Fri 18th Mar 2005, 20:16, More)
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