b3ta.com user Ariaxen
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Early thirties female, computer science graduate, sometime digital artist.

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» Impromptu Games You Play

The Game
The Game is simply called "The Game".

The object of The Game is to forget you are playing The Game. I first was introduced to this in 1996 or thereabouts.

You lose if at any time you remember you're playing The Game. When you do remember you're playing it, you must tell everyone in your present company that you "Just remembered I'm playing The Game" - and then proceed to explain the rules to them, as they are now (whether they like it or not) playing The Game also. You have 20 minutes to forget all about The Game before it restarts.

The Game by its very nature spreads like wildfire. I was at a barbecue last summer and someone who was entirely unconnected with the set I know remembered she was playing The Game...

BTW, you're all playing it now as by default, I just remembered I am playing it. Thats the rules.
(Wed 31st Mar 2004, 13:02, More)

» Mugged

I hope the cheeky little f*cker choked.
I'm lucky enough to never have been mugged by a human, though I was once mugged by a pigeon outside Southampton's Bargate Centre. I was sat on a bench eating a choc chip muffin when one of the city's aerial rats.

The fat bastard defied physics as it flew in, landed on my lap, grabbed hold of the muffin in its beak and flew off with it.
(Thu 15th Jun 2006, 15:54, More)

» School fights

Fight? me - never.
I wasn't in any fights worth mentioning but I was a spectator at one rather impressive one in the playground at Primary School.

To set the scene a bit, this was a rural junior school with a 99% white population and most kids had never seen anyone else from a non-white background. Then, one term, two Thai boys joined the school, one was about 10 and his little brother 6. No one really knew what racism was, but still new kids were new kids.

The 6 year old was tiny for his age & looked a bit weedy, so was of course singled out for a bit of roughing up by his classmates. About 10 or so boys from his year and the year above circled round him in that way that boys do, all were at least a foot taller than him.

Unfortunately for them, he'd been going to kickboxing lessons since (possibly before) he could walk and kicked the shit out of a couple of them before the rest sloped off before they met the same fate.
(Tue 14th Mar 2006, 17:28, More)

» Oldies vs Computers

I didn't have a story..
until about 10 seconds ago..

when my boss asks me to help him download a large file. Fine. I get it going and saving to desktop & tell him to call me when it was at 100% and I'd come back and help him open it.

Fine, I thought.

I just get back to my desk and sit down to hear him say, "oh its taking too long to download I'm going to close it down and start again.."

Stand up, walk back to Boss's desk. Restart download. Make him promise not to close it down again until its finished.

Gah!
(Tue 26th Sep 2006, 17:28, More)

» On the stage

Its all Gobo's & Gaffer tape to me.
Despite doing Drama GCSE, A-level Performing Arts & being a member of the local youth theatre, my preferred place was in the wings, or with a reel of gaffer tape in hand halfway up a scaffold rig fixing the lights (usually because some twunt had overloaded the circuit).

There was the usual, expected drunken antics in the sound booth, pranks with gaffer tape, shining spotlights in to the snobby leading ladys eyes...

There was an incedent about 10 years ago when I was almost potentially seriously injured when some nameless wanker who is now doing quite well in the West End writing his own stuff, decided to push the rig (50 foot tall scaffolding tower used for reaching lights & other high up things) violently across the hall knowing full well I was on top of it changing a bulb. I almost dropped the spotlight, did drop the bulb (it smashed), lost my balance and fell flat on my arse thankfully onto the platform on the top of the scaffold tower. Sadly I knocked off the roll of gaffer tape which as if by fate smacked him on the head leaving a nice black bruise for opening night.

I got my own back proper on the night when I made sure that the dry ice for his act billowed out superbly completely hiding his ugly bruised mug from view of the audience.
(Fri 2nd Dec 2005, 12:47, More)
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