» Shoddy Presents

One year my grandad
gave all the females in the family matching 'gold' braclets. They were awful but so as not to offend him we wore them all christmas day.

On boxing we all had matching rashes around our wrists.
(Thu 23rd Sep 2004, 16:14, More)

» Best Comebacks

Not me, Harold Bishop
Apparently at some sort of Neighbours meet and greet a guy went up to Harold Bishop and asked him why he was so fat, to which Harold replied "because everytime i f**ked your mum I ate a pie".
(Fri 30th Apr 2004, 14:49, More)

» Injured Siblings

wrist
My brother is three years older than me. About a month before my fifth birthday he broke my wrist. I'm not sure how but I know he did it on purpose, to this day (20 years later) he still insists I fell and he's brainwashed mum and dad into believing his version of events.
Worse still, after a couple of weeks in a cast the swelling had gone down and my cast was quite lose. He told me this meant my arm was fixed and it was time to take of the cast. He helped me pull the cast off, the shoved it back on when mum came in wondering what all the screaming was about.
So technically speaking he broke my wrist twice in two weeks.
And he wondered why I didn't bother getting anyone to help him when he fell off his bike into the rose bushes.
(Tue 23rd Aug 2005, 21:02, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

A few that made me giggle
What is better than winning a medal at the Special Olympics?
Not being retarded

What's the first thing a woman does when she gets out of the battered wives' shelter?
The dishes if she knows what's good for her

What do 54,000 abused women every year have in common?
They don't fucking listen

What do you get when you cross two black people?
Your ass kicked
(Fri 10th Sep 2004, 14:32, More)

» People with Stupid Names

Did anyone else see
that British bandminton player in the Olympics called Natalie Munt. She had MUNT written across the back of her shirt. te he.
(Thu 26th Aug 2004, 13:54, More)