b3ta.com user arkarkark
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Coo, it's Dark in 'ere.

The job starts at 9, so you'll have to get a potato clock (up at 8 o'clock)


It'd look funny if it only had 6 inches

You're not making a canoe out of me!

Calling all Elephants! Calling all Elephants!

It wasn't an ambush, It was a Bacon Tree!

I feel your presents.

You can email me b3ta _(@)_ wtwf /dot/ com

remove all those _()_ ~ and / and replace dot with . and the - paranoid enough?

Recent front page messages:


Best answers to questions:

» Impromptu Games You Play

in a wide open area you take a broom and hold it upto the sky with the bristles up. look at the top of the broom and spin around 50 times. on the count of 50 you have to bring the broom down and stand on the head holding onto the handle still. watching them fall over is always hilarious.

broom == brush (boom boom!)
(Wed 31st Mar 2004, 23:23, More)

» Impromptu Games You Play

The Game
My friend and I play a game when we're on the phone (I live a long way away). If we're on the phone and our wife walks in they have to "Play The Game" and show us their boobs.

It's a great game...
(Wed 31st Mar 2004, 22:46, More)

» Shit Stories

licorice flavored ice cream
In Santa Cruz, CA, Mariannes icecream sells a licorice flavoured ice cream.

just one scoop will make your poo bright green for a whole day. (maybe next st pattys day?)

but red wine sends my poo black too

and it's safer not to get me started on the guiness...
(Thu 6th May 2004, 11:50, More)

» Foot in Mouth Syndrome

I've not been Sucking Cock
Sometimes my jaw locks up when I yawn. The only good thing is I get a day off work and a morphine drip before they can ease it back into place. I am a bloke.

So in the lunch room at work I was telling my co-workers what my dentist had told me, that oftentimes it's young hotties in college that end up locking their jaws after a weekend playing the skin flute with a new boyfriend.

I then told my co-workers what I said to the Dentist. "I don't know what to say Doc, I haven't been Sucking Dick all weekend".

Just as the female CEO of the company walked by the open door.
(Thu 22nd Apr 2004, 0:18, More)