» Foot in Mouth Syndrome

We were having a curry one night
and as we got up to leave, it struck me as funny to say "You know, I've had it up to here with dwarves" and put my hand at hip level, my mate immediately slapped his hand on his forehead as I turned and noticed a table full of the vertically challenged buggers sat behind me.
(Thu 22nd Apr 2004, 20:20, More)

» Slang Survey

In the north
we have the term "pikeys Wedding" to describe a not inconsiderable fight.
(Sun 1st Feb 2004, 14:57, More)

» Slang Survey

I quite like
The exclaimation "Fuck Me Running!"

but that's just me...

Oh yeah, I just remembered "Glasgow Shower" too, it's a quick spray of deoderant before one goes out "on the Onk"

Christ, I wish I could remember all of these at once, it'd certainely make life easier.

But...

"Licking your arse and calling it chocolate" is the practice of being overly optimistic in a hopeless situation

and a BOBFOC is a woman with a great rack and pegs but a face like a builder, from "Body Off Baywatch Face Off Crimewatch"

I think that's about all I can remember, but then I was a juvenile gluesniffer so I dunno...
(Mon 2nd Feb 2004, 20:38, More)

» Have you ever started a fire?

Fire in the disco
I once set fire to a neighbours leylandi tree and denied all knowledge of it claiming "I was at the shops and it was on fire when I came back".

They moved a week or so later.

Something I said?
(Tue 2nd Mar 2004, 19:39, More)

» Slang Survey

That reminds me of
"Fancy Wank", similar to a posh wank but it uses an ugly birds fanny to save wear and tear on your hand, I'm not a chauvanist*, honest.




*however the hell you spell that
(Mon 2nd Feb 2004, 20:46, More)