b3ta.com user Floz
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Profile for Floz:
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Night Owl.
Stage Engineer.

I was sitting in the street, calmly drawing out schematics... then I found b3ta.

Recent front page messages:


Best answers to questions:

» Stupid Tourists

Sadly, I was a tourist at the time...
In London, with an Educational Tour Company, (EF Tours, the evil blue bag bearing herds of 'mericans)... We had seperated from the tour group, as we (my family and I) didn't exactly want to eat at Burger King in London. Hell, I can eat at Burger King at home. After eating a wonderful lunch in a small, cozy pub, we met back up at the tube station... This older woman with our tour group asked "Where did ya'll go for lunch?". To which I responded, "Some pub, it was awesome.". Her statement following that was something to the effect of...

"Ewww, I can't believe you would eat the local food!"

I may be an American by birth, but I don't willingly claim to be from her 'neck of the woods'.
(Wed 13th Jul 2005, 16:30, More)

» Stuff You've Overheard

I was in the ER...
Getting my head stapled together after a night of drunken stupidity involving a car, pavement, and an ambulance ride.

Anyway, I overheard the cop that responded when my friends called 911 talking to the paramedics while they put my staples in. "He's just young, dumb, and a little drunk, lucky he didn't break his damned neck."

He said practically the same thing to me, and told me that in the state of Idaho, it is not illegal to eject yourself from a moving vehicle. "It would seem stupid enough to deter most people."
(Thu 10th Jun 2004, 9:11, More)

» Your Revenge Stories

In High School
Bear in mind, I went to a southern US high school in a redneck farming town.

As a budding computer geek, I was given the chance to design the school's webpage (hosted by a local ISP). The woman put in charge of myself and two others was completely ignorant of anything related to web design, or the internet for that matter. We published a very nice flash marquee that could be altered by simply changing a textfile, for updates and info on school events. She failed to upload it properly. We put together a photo archive site for her and the photography students to use. She broke it.

As I understand (nearly 5 years later), she still gets animal sex pornography, urine related pornography, and good ole lesbian pornography in her e-mail at the school. She's quite the Southern Belle, too.
(Fri 14th May 2004, 2:13, More)

» Unexpected Good Fortune

My first car.
Common to the stereotype of young american teenage boys, I had my first car at the age of 16, and no idea how dangerous driving really can be.

On a routine trip across town, I decided to take a back road, and "open her up" a little. Going through the gears, I topped 90 mph (145 kph). Just as I look up from my speedometer, I notice a station wagon slowly ambling out of a factory parking lot.

Fearing the worst, and lacking experience, I locked up all four brakes on the car. Now I'm sliding, and I'm saying every prayer I can remember from primary school. I see red and blue lights from a white hot-rod in the other lane, I overcorrect to avoid hitting him and I slide out of control into a tree. The trunk (boot) of the car struck the tree, and straightened the slide out. The tree ( a stout pine sapling ) sheared off where the side of my car hit it.

The blue and red lights happened to be an undercover cop who was planning on citing me for speeding. When he saw me narrowly escape smashing him, and other cars, he decided to let me go home with a warning... scared out of my wits. What a nice policeman.

My car was relatively undamaged afterwards. A little sheetmetal work, and the taillight fit again. However, thinking of what might've happened, had I slid into that behemoth of a station wagon... or into that police car. I've not been that lucky since.
(Tue 19th Sep 2006, 2:32, More)

» Near Death Experiences II

Pushed from a moving car...
...or perhaps I jumped. Entirely too many beers at a movie premiere party, and on the ride home, I was ejected from a moving car. Details are still a bit foggy as to how it all happened, even years later.

I am led to understand that my bootheels caught, causing a near perfect backflip. Only my head got in the way of the street. Twenty-some-odd staples later, and a very nice policeman telling me "It's not unlawful to eject yourself from a moving vehicle, but to most folks it seems like a bad enough idea to prevent giving it a go.".

I remember waking up in the gutter, bleeding profusely, and trying to shrug it off and walk home. The following day, we found a lovely splat about the size of a smallish apple where I first landed, and a huge dried red splotch a bit further down where I lay unconscious bleeding for a moment.

...I don't drink any more, but not because of this moment of foolishness years ago.
(Mon 19th May 2014, 7:47, More)
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