b3ta.com user armaitus
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Profile for armaitus:
Profile Info:

I reside in Yorkshire Huddersfield but do not keep whippets, wear a flat cap etc.

Home Styley



Recent front page messages:

Royal Approval

(Tue 16th Jul 2002, 16:31, More)

Animal Park

(Wed 1st May 2002, 11:31, More)

Best answers to questions:

» More Pet Stories

Around ten years ago I had a cat named TC (I didn't name him, his real name was Officer Dribble). At the time, I also had a lodger who was more of a dog person than a cat person... TC doted on him. One day TC decided that just jumping on the lodgers bed and purring at him wasn't enough and the best way to get in his good books was to bring him a bird.

My lodger went batshit - a god ten minute tirade followed as the lodger lectures the cat on how endangered birds are and how unhygienic avian carcasses are. TC slinked off, disappointed.

Later that afternoon, TC dashes back into the house and starts batting something about the room - diving after it in that way cats do when they've brought a live victim in to entertain you. The lodger was about to begin his lecture again when TC stops and drops his present in front of us... he'd dug up a tulip bulb from the garden across the road and was playing with that.

TC didn't openly hunt birds until he died around 5 years later. He stuck to rodents and never brought presents to the Lodger again.
(Fri 1st Feb 2013, 16:42, More)

» Racist grandparents

When discussing terrorism one Christmas (as you do) the subject of the wrongful accusation of young asian males came up. From a brandy fuelled haze my dozing Grandfather blurted out: "Hitler had the right idea... concentration camps for the lot of them... bloody pakis!".
(Fri 28th Oct 2011, 16:21, More)

» Toilets

Loosely connected
More a work in progress...

Many years ago whilst learning to drive (in a knackered old Lada Samara van) I managed to slip the vehicle into reverse instead of first and backed (at speed) into my neighbours garden, shattering a beautiful white lavatory she had lovingly filled with soil and flowers.
(Fri 2nd Sep 2005, 11:58, More)

» Teenage Poetry

Sheep Casings
Sitting in a bath full of hot dogs and brine,
Slowly brought to the boil,
I relax and reflect on the day that I've had,
And how it was worth all the toil.
(Thu 11th Aug 2005, 16:10, More)