» Losing Your Virginity

i got to lose it twice!!
it was many years ago, or at least more than i care to get specific about and the gentleman in question was...oh shall we say...tiny, at least he was where it counted.

now i realize there are different degrees of smallness, but at the time i had never seen a naked penis before so i had nothing to compare it to and could not appreciate the exceptional size of what was being presented before me. it was about 3 1/2 inches hard and about as thick as one of my petite super girly thumbs.

he was on top of me, flailing around and i couldnt feel a thing but was too polite to mention it. i had heard rumours that it was supposed to hurt and be bloody and all that and was left feeling a little dissapointed. i thought, "is that all there is?"

we broke up 3 months and 30 or so repeat sex acts later and it wasnt until i had gotten together with my second boyfriend that i was schooled. one afternoon, some squeaky whimpering and set of blood stained sheets later i had finally popped my cherry.

to this day i seldom think of that first experience, unless i happen to be served a cocktail weanie, in which case it all comes flooding back.
(Sun 6th Mar 2005, 0:06, More)

» Corporate Idiocy

My Boss
Called me to tell me he was going to call me after lunch.

Then he called me after lunch to tell me he wasn't going to call me.

Later, he called me to apologize for not calling me.*




*I don't know why he apologized, my only duty was to answer the phone. So essentially he just said he was sorry for asking me to do my job.
(Sat 25th Feb 2012, 5:35, More)

» People with Stupid Names

almost forgot...
my ex used to work a postal route and heard some real good ones, or eternal favorite was gay wiener
(Mon 30th Aug 2004, 0:18, More)

» People with Stupid Names

we had one in my school
justin case *groan*
(Mon 30th Aug 2004, 0:17, More)