» Toilets

Loos
This happens far too often. Context: I'm female and six foot tall. I join the queue in the ladies, only to have the person in front of me half turn round and jump half out of their skin. Yes, I am a woman, no I'm not a transsexual, and yes I am in the right toilet.
(Fri 2nd Sep 2005, 21:05, More)

» It was a great holiday, but...

School holiday
A school holiday to Vienna many years ago - you'd think that when they booked the holiday they might have checked certain things. Such as, is the hotel in the middle of the red light district and generally charges by the hour? Especially if you're taking a group from an all-girls school.

Though given the man who organised the trip was the man who said this on the way to the hotel:

"My, those are tall women!"
Pause.
"Erm, Sir, those are drag queens..."
(Sat 23rd Apr 2005, 8:14, More)

» Bastard Colleagues

The Internet Saved My Life!
Almost. Summer job from uni, an entertain the tourists while dressed up as Ye Olde Worlde people job.

The bastard was D, who by dint of doing this every summer was regarded as top of the 'dressed up like idiots' heirachy.

D felt that underwear was historically inaccurate, and would often demonstrate this to us and the tourists.

D's bowel movements took priority, even though the single tiny toilet opened on to the cupboard space we had to hide in while waiting for our cues.

But the internet saved me. D thought that because I was female and under 30 I would be good to shock. He started off with vicious sexist jokes, to which I would tell an even nastier sexist joke. After a while he realised that this wasn't working, so he moved on to the magazines. I'd be greeted in the morning with pictures of splayed women and pierced penises. Shocking? Not to someone who has seen Goatse and Tubgirl. After the final picture, of a split penis, to which I replied "Oh, I haven't seen one of those without a barbell in before" he gave up. Thank you internets.
(Thu 24th Jan 2008, 23:05, More)

» School Trips

I loved my school trips
All girls school. Teacher determined to save money on trips to Europe. End result - 50 girls staying in a hotel in the middle of the red light district. Note this didn't happen once, but every trip abroad.

Coaches are expensive, so walk everywhere ("Everyone meet outside the sex shop in ten minutes sharp!"), and fare dodge on public transport when it's too far.

Teacher in question I think was naive rather than malicious; he was author of the phrase "My, those are tall women", in reference to a group of drag queens.

On a more personal note, going round the Vatican on a school trip when you're running a high fever and mildly hallucinating is something to remember.
(Thu 7th Dec 2006, 20:45, More)

» I met a weirdo on the interweb

Mad Trekkies
I may be a terrible nerd, but I have limits. The woman who had the cast of 'Enterprise' tattooed on her back, and then showed it to them at a convention. And she'd seemed at least relatively normal up to that point.
(Fri 17th Mar 2006, 18:25, More)