b3ta.com user seanfish
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» My computer gave away my secrets

Dad, you dog you...
I live in the country, so sometimes if I'm going out on the town it's convenient for me to stay overnight at my parent's house.

Imagine my joy when I got home to find that my parents had decided to get their very first computer, and gone the whole hog by getting an internet connection to go with it (dialup but well miracles don't happen overnight...)

So I gleefully settle down to check my email before bed... and am struck horrified by the animal porn site that pops up in the autocomplete. Desirous of more pain to my soul I looked in the history to find that he'd visited a number of such sites but at least had the sense to set up a yahoo mail address to field the emails from those that required registration.

I went to bed and lay staring at the ceiling for a number of hours wondering what kind of world it was where my mother's partner in life liked to look at pictures of women sucking dog's penises.

As you do.

Of course there was only one response. The next morning I had a gentle talk about how to hide his tracks for these kinds of excursions. There comes a point in everyone's life when the role of parent and child becomes reversed. How we handle it determines the course of that tender relationship.
(Wed 15th Feb 2006, 1:23, More)

» Black Sheep

Yup, this is *the* most depressing question compo ever. Officially.
I forgot to add the other reason I'm the black sheep - I'm open and honest about my mental illness (bipolar) and it makes my mum (depressive codependent), dad (alcoholic) and brother (wifebeating alcoholic sociopath) very unhappy as they prefer to hide the shame lest the neighbours find out.

It's the new millenium, we should all be able to dance in daisy-covered fields holding hands.
(Sat 15th Jan 2005, 1:32, More)

» Black Sheep

My brother
is a charmer. Last year he left his wife and three children under 4 for another bird, he's under audit from the tax dept., he's got creditors for his business after him and he made a false claim on his insurance to the tune of $NZ15 000 (about 5 000 pounds).

On top of that I found out he's been regularly giving out my name to the police when getting stopped for speeding.

Nonetheless I'm the black sheep of my family because I don't lie back and accept all this crap as him just being a unique individual with special needs of his own.

(Sat 15th Jan 2005, 1:09, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

What's green and smells of bacon?
Kermit's finger.
(Thu 9th Sep 2004, 21:59, More)

» * PFFT *

Church camp
Ok yes I was young and fired up with jesus... but imagine a hall full of young fervent youngsters being preached to about the hooooooly spirit... and then up the back the old guy who owns the camp lets out a long, slow loud one for literal minutes at an end... and not wanting to upset the leaders there is now a roomful of pious teens gurning to keep from cracking up at the sound.
(Sat 14th Jul 2007, 1:26, More)
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