b3ta.com user Shazzoir
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Profile for Shazzoir:
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I'm a vintage model female who lives in Queensland, Australia, and I'm built for comfort these days, not for speed ;)

I have three classic cars, like photography, travelling, taking photos while I'm travelling, sometimes while driving, which probably isn't that safe really. Don't try that at home, kids.

I mostly draw just for shits and giggles if I'm in a good mood on the board and draw or write just about every night, it's my meditation time really. I'm also rather enamoured of creating huge, sprawling fictional tales starring my own original characters (OCs) and a friend's OC, who we collaborated on to create: Kurt. I draw him a LOT, as well as my own boys Lonnie, Deacon, Jay, Chris and Denny (you'll find some of those lovely lads below). Most of the stuff I make is gifts for people but I do do the odd commission for REAL CASH MONEY, what a novelty!

7th May 2009: Farewell, my much loved Kimbi: 16 years of your fluff, love and purring was not anywhere near long enough for me. You trained four Rotties for me while you lived, and your firm paw of discipline has always been a good thing for those naughty puppies. I'll miss you, my little man.

This is my baby: She's a 1977 Ford Falcon 500 GS hardtop (Pillarless coupe to be exact), and I love her to bits. Plus she goes like absolute stink!


CD cover design for a friend's band's EP titled 'That Ain't Fair'

Junior, looking relaxed

Was mucking around with T-shirt designs and this was the result

Lovely friend Chris, guitarist par excellence in my fave band. 'Twas his 50th birthday, and I quickly scratched this up for him. He adores it and blew it up to HUGE size and it now sits on the wall of his music room :D

Right… this was a request from my dear friend Stephen O’Malley from South Australia’s neo-rockabilly band, The Saucermen… he asked if I would use my imagination and illustrate one of his songs, “On Jagged Rocks” which you can listen to here. It’s a salutory lesson that all is not always as it appears and well… listen for yourself.


"Caveman In A Spaceship" The lyrics of this song by one of my fave neo-rockabilly bands, The Saucermen, tickled my sense of the absurd so much, I had to draw this

The finished product

My dear Nano

Ding, upright bass playing dingo

Ted, the mascot of my weekly rockabilly radio show “Rockabilly Downunder”

A lovely gentleman and a damn fine musician… Fernando Lavado Villanueva lead vocalist and drummer of the sensational ‘Gatos Locos’, Spain.

King C and family are expecting a new arrival to the royal line any day now, and it will be interesting to see if grand daughter Lea will follow in the family’s footsteps with regard to an exceptional talent for music…

One of my dear friends lost his beloved father Guiseppe, on this day, fifteen years ago. He posted a heartfelt message on Facebook, with a photo of this handsome man, his father, and I felt compelled to draw him. I loved doing his eyes and hair the most.

Junior again.

Kurt and his pet duck, Sarge

2013 Chrimbo card

CD cover for a local Brissie rockabilly band's EP, titled "That Ain't Fair"

That dude from Supernatural. Friend's birthday gift.

Another gift for my buddy, Zach in the USA

My little heartbreaker, Deacon.

One of my characters, Ally Weber

Art of my dear friend Chema who runs the radio station I broadcast for.

Kurt in his truck

Gift art for an Austrian rockabilly band I adore, and surprise surprise, they are featuring it on their new CD which comes out in September 2014!

The loss of a pet is never easy but I did this for a couple of friends so they had something nice to remember her by

Old art of a friend's Staffy

Lena and Devlin, two more of my characters.

Farewell gift for a visiting French student, Thibault; his dog

Another of my characters, 'Junior'

A friend's OC, Howler:

My character, Deacon - "Wanna Ride?"

Vance: One of my fave dudes

Castiel for Nis

Denny Carsonne (C) me

DA hairdo

Murduck, LOL


Friend from work, Shane

Majestic creatures (Vance camping)

Lonnie at the bar:

Lonnie detail:

Vance on his cycle

Fucking about with the classics:

Kelsey, one of my OCs.


Recent front page messages:


Best answers to questions:

» * PFFT *

Filling up with gas
Last one I promise.

My ex and my friend, Dave, popped down the service station to buy some fags, and when they got back, they were both almost legless with laughter. It took a good ten minutes before they'd stopped laughing long enough to tell me that just as they'd come in, the Armaguard guy had arrived to take the day's takings from the till. The shopkeeper told Dave and the ex that they had to lock down the servo while this transaction was taking place, but that he would let them pay and go before locking the place up for the ten minute transaction. Just as Dave paid for his smokes, he dropped his guts, quietly but with deadly effect. Apparently even HIS eyes were watering as they both fled the place. When they got outside, and the doors had been locked from the inside, trapping the hapless Armaguard guy and counter attendant in the wall of stench. What tripped them over the line of near hysteria was the look of sheer horror on the faces of the two men trapped inside the evil-smelling environment, the comedy effect of which was so great, that Dave and the ex stuck around for a few minutes, helpless with laughter, to watch the show. It was only when the doors were finally unlocked and the green faced Armaguard man opened the door that they fled.
(Fri 13th Jul 2007, 15:28, More)

» My Worst Date

Worst date? Hmmm, only one for me...
End of semester Art College party, lots of serious young stick insects in 'individual' states of dress, trying desperately to look
edgy and cool. I was invited to attend by a smashing friend, who wanted to set me up with one of the few good looking and not too egotistical eligible lads.

I was introduced and we then spent most of the night waiting to board the tourist type cruise boat which was to take our happy group up and down the Brisbane River for several hours. Boat was delayed, so much drinking ensued in the interim. My date was beginning to slur slightly by this stage, but was still coherent and charming, and the night was young.

Cruise boat finally arrives, we all board, and finally, I get to drag my date to the upper deck for some fresh air. By now, on a steady intake of Strongbow cider, he has abandoned the charming manner and is beginning to give off that slightly desperate air that is the result of trying too hard to be cool. We are sitting side by side, when he leans over for a quick kiss, then breaks away, says "Pardon me," then without missing a beat or removing his arm from my breasticular regions, he leans two feet to the right, vomits copiously over the side of the boat onto the deck and patrons below, wipes his mouth, and amid the screams of dismay and disgust from the patrons below, turns back to me, partially pre-digested finger food liberally adorning his gothic attire, ready to re-apply his aromatic mouth to mine. At that point, I excused myself, and I spent the rest of the evening trying to dodge him, as he followed me all over the boat, asking if people had seen me, and only stopping briefly to spew every ten minutes or so. I was like a prey animal, hiding and trying desperately to keep one step ahead of the predator.

He was still topping himself up with Strongbow as he lurched about the vessel, so the chances of me allowing him to get close enough again were very, very slim indeed.

Moments before the boat docked and I could escape, he leapt off the deck of the boat in a manly display of athleticism, failing to reach the jetty by a good metre or so. I made sure he was fished out in one piece before fleeing the scene. I ended up going to the casino alone and winning enough cash from a poker machine to more than compensate me for the lost enjoyment of the evening.
(Fri 22nd Oct 2004, 13:19, More)

» More nice things

It's pretty minimal, but counts I guess
Every Friday arvo when I leave work, I go through the local McDonalds to enjoy a 50 cent ice cream cone. I like to give the cashier $5.50 with the instructions to give the next ten people through the drive through a free ice cream cone if they want one. Been doing this for some months now, and the one and only time someone from the queue behind me caught up and managed to give me a cheer, it was a road crew truck full of yellow hi-vis vest wearing workers, each raising their ice cream cones to me from the next lane as they flew by me. Made my damn day, actually.
(Sun 23rd Nov 2014, 10:09, More)

» Karma

Fastest Karmic payback ever.
Whilst on holidays some years back, my partner needed to get hold of some aspirin for a shocking headache, so we drove into this little town on the coast of northern New South Wales looking for a Chemist.

We found one, and whilst inside, Mr S drew my attention to a rack of sunglasses of the kind that fits over your existing prescription glasses, covering them totally. I'd never seen such a great idea, and picked up a pair. Mr S then spotted a sign saying "Buy one get one free from this rack" as they were all end-of-line sunglasses.

The girl on the counter rang up the price, but didn't do the 'free' thing, so she had to have another go and couldn't figure out how to enter it into the computer system. She became totally flustered, and had to consult another counter-girl who also couldn't figure it out.

Eventually between the two of them, they managed to complete the transaction and as I was walking out the door with our new sunglasses and the aspirin, Mr S took a look at the receipt and whispered "They cocked up! They didn't charge us for one pair, and charged only half price for the other!"

I was halfway through turning around to go back when he ushered me out of the shop, muttering under his breath "Quick! Before they realise and call after you! GO!"

In the truck (my Ford F350 ute, no airconditioning) and on the road again, Mr S was jubilant, chortling about how we'd got something for free. I told him that I would have preferred to go back and make a clean breast of it, but he just laughed at me for being a 'goody two shoes'.

Not five minutes later, we were driving down some deserted country road, and ploughed through a mist of something spread across the road.

The mist was a swarm of bees, a dozen or so of which were driven into the cabin of the truck by the slipstream. Mr S was stung three times, I got off scot-free. Pulling over to urge the winged survivors out the window, I picked two out of my hair, while Mr S ouched and %&*#@ at the stings on his arm, neck and scalp.

He then said "That's the quickest Karmic beat down I've ever seen in my life." Had to agree.
(Fri 22nd Feb 2008, 11:54, More)

» The Onosecond

OH NO, with a vengeance
Was at work with a colleague when the IT dude came in to upgrade something on all the computers, and asked my colleague to log on for him. Colleague logs on and while I watch disinterestedly, waiting for him to get back to our conversation, I witness the colleague's screen wink into life, displaying the most sensationally in-your-face full frontal gynacological display of female map of Tassie from the email the boss had sent him ten minutes earlier, which he had forgotten to shut down after viewing. Colleage's face turns beet red, IT dude (who is a religious chap aged about 60) calmly waits for my now sweating colleage to close the offending view of the full-on beaver shot with googly eyes photoshopped on top with the words "Kiss Me" emblazoned beneath. He was never able to meet the IT dude's eyes ever again, and resigned shortly after.

For once, I wasn't the one who cocked up. Nice one Big Man.
(Thu 26th May 2005, 11:47, More)
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