b3ta.com user Neuromancer
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» Toilets

Inflight entertainment...
Just remembered this one.

Returning to Australia for a friends wedding a couple of years ago I flew BA. The aircraft was particularly old, you know no seat back monitors just a couple of puny 12" monitors stuck in the ceiling.
So a couple of hours into the flight I decide to relieve both myself and the boredem.
Business complete I'm standing at the the teeny tiny stainless steel sink reading the labels as I wash my hands when I saw one that read -
"Cabin Crew must wash their genitals after using the toilet"

It's not on newer aircraft so I presume BA decided it was impractical to have the crew standing on the rim and thrusting their minge/todger under the tap.

As the cabin crew appear to be using it as a whisk I think they should apologise for length
(Sun 4th Sep 2005, 16:54, More)

» Never Meet Your Heroes

more my dim brother...
Came home from work once to my dosser brother announcing 'Guess what? Dad met his idol today'

Me a little surprised mainly 'cause I didn't know he had one asks who that might be.

'Louis Armstrong' says he.

Obviously I'm a little surprised by this - dad didn't even own one of his records.

'Louis Armstrong?' says I.

'Yeah. You know, first man on the moon!'
(Sat 27th May 2006, 17:12, More)

» Petty Sabotage

Not Sabotage but....
Used to head into town to the large department store there and head for the electrical section.
We'd set all the stereos that had alarms on them to go off in 5 minutes and then turn the volume all the way up. off we'd sneak to the other side of the floor and watch with much hilarity as they went off just as some poor mug was looking at them and nearly give them a heart attack.

1st post yay!
(Sun 8th May 2005, 23:36, More)

» Toilets

All I want for christmas....
Not sure what age but I was losing teeth at the time. Sitting on the crapper minding my own business when the door flies open and my little brother charges in and headbuts me. As I sat there slack jawed wondering what the fuck that was for a tooth dropped out.

I always make sure the door is locked now.
(Sat 3rd Sep 2005, 11:43, More)

» Sacked

Micky D's part 2
Not me but 2 guys I worked with got the boot (technically I suppose one of them quit).

First guy was only new and was being trained in at the french fries station. Boss started giving him a bit of grief for being too slow so we told him that he shouldn't take any shit from her as she was only store manager because her folks owned the place. Stupid git took it literally and suggested this was the case in front of the whole restaraunt.

Second one was a guy who was told to take the sacks of rubbish that were built up by the back door out to the dumpster shed at the back of the car park. 2 hours later when the lunch rush was over someone thinks to say "where's reggie got to?" Managers in a bit of panic thinking he might have been abducted or something call his parents to find out that halfway across the carpark he's decided sod this I'm going home.
(Fri 24th Feb 2006, 0:42, More)
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