b3ta.com user whirleygig
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» The last thing that made me cry

Two things that made me cry...
...discovering that there's no b3ta newsletter this week, and seeing Google ads on the b3ta homepage. :'(
(Sun 17th Apr 2005, 11:32, More)

» Teenage Poetry

Yes, yes, its not mine, its by Monty Python, so what....
A Latin Poem

A saila sed tumi vercani baea frog?
Aet oldim via dua nu livdi nava bog.
E sed aedgita peni tu tacem aut again
Buta sae tucis muni aeurdit pulda chain.

And another one:

A panto-writer, Harry Hyam,
Who was extremely fond of rhyme,
One day said to his comrades: "I'm
Just sick of writing pantomime
For which I get paid half a dime,
I'm going to write a poem sublime,
By which you'll see my fame will climb
Above all others, for this time
I'm only going to use ONE rhyme!"
His friends said he was past his prime
And even working overtime,
They said, he'd never keep ONE rhyme
Right through a poem. But Harry Hyam
Had started off and by noontime
He'd written fifteen lines of rhymes
Each one the same, and by tea-time
He'd written more and more betime.
But listen! Isn't it a crime?
It happened that a small enzyme*
That looked just like a speck of lime
Had landed on his head some time,
And as he heard the midnight chime
This enzyme started making slime
That smelt of matters maritime,
And oozed out through his fingers' grime
And landed on his paper. I'm
Quite sure I don't have to mime
What happened next, but, by bedtime,
The slime and grime has caused a zyme**
Which wholly covered Harry Hyam,
And, as he lived in Hildesheim
Which has a hot and sultry clime
(Especially in the summertime),
This zyme converted into chyme***
And soon digested Harry Hyam
From slimy feet to slimy cyme,****
His hands, his hair, his pen, his rhyme.
And all it left was the half a dime
They'd paid him for the pantomime
They put on once, in Burgwindheim.
His friends came round at breakfast time,
And sighed to find this paradigm
Of poets gone. The half a dime
They took and tied it up in sime*****
And burried it in Gundelsheim.
And on the grave they planted thyme,
- For that's all there was left to rhyme.

*Enzyme: "Any of a class of complex organic substances that cause chemical transformations of material in plants and animals; formerly called ferment."
**Zyme: "The substance causing a zymotic infectious disease." (zymotic="A general epithet for infectious disease, originally because regarded as being caused by a process analogous to fermentation.")
***Chyme: "The semi-fluid pulpy acid matter into which food is converted in the stomach by the action of the gastric secretion."
****Cyme: "A head" (From the French: cyme or cime meaning: "top, summit")
*****Sime: "A rope or cord" (A northern dialect word last recorded in 1899)

Been looking for somewhere to share these for ages. Thanks b3ta!
(Wed 17th Aug 2005, 15:25, More)

» I'm an expert

I'm an expert in...
1. Worrying
2. Offending other people when I don't mean to and
3. Making a fool of myself.

My life is fun...
(Sat 25th Jun 2005, 23:50, More)

» Walkman Flashbacks

Not quite a flashback, but still...
Yesterday, when I was walking out of school after the very last day of term. The Easter Holidays were about to begin.
I took out my iPod and turned it on, and guess what, the first song is Iron Maiden - Running Free.

It couldn't have been more apt.
(Fri 25th Mar 2005, 10:09, More)

» Beautiful Moments

As a little kiddie...
The very first time I heard Led Zeppelin: The "Stairway to Heaven" clip on albinoblacksheep.com. Since then I've been in love with Led Zep.
(Tue 15th Mar 2005, 21:56, More)
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