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- a member for 19 years, 8 months and 23 days
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» Inappropriate crushes
Richard Whiteley
A mate of ours admitted she'd had a particularly "saucy" dream about Richard Whiteley.
She still hasn't lived it down to this day - why would you tell us, why would you tell anyone?
(Fri 29th Sep 2006, 9:31, More)
Richard Whiteley
A mate of ours admitted she'd had a particularly "saucy" dream about Richard Whiteley.
She still hasn't lived it down to this day - why would you tell us, why would you tell anyone?
(Fri 29th Sep 2006, 9:31, More)
» Mugged
Don't mess with the Oirish
My dad's mate came over from Ireland about 40 odd years ago and has worked as a labourer all his life. He's now in his 70s, built like a bricksh1thouse and the nicest guy you could meet.
One night he was walking his dog through some woods near Blantyre (a salubrious suburb outside of Glasgow), when two neds/chavs decided to mug "an old man walking his dog". Packie has other ideas. He picks up his little yappy dog, and rips a sapling right out of the ground and starts chasing the young miscreants. They bolt, and Packie gives up the chase.
But he's not finished. Instead of going home like most folk would, he hides in the bushes near his house and waits. Eventually one of the two comes swaggering up the road and into the local shop. Packie follows him in and pins the guy by the neck against the wall about a foot off the ground. Needless to say, the wee b'stard shits it and won't be doing that again!
Moral of the story. Don't fcuk with an Irish labourer, no matter how old he is.
Pop. There goes my cherry after much lurking. The length hurt at first, but got better. Now I like it.
(Fri 16th Jun 2006, 17:43, More)
Don't mess with the Oirish
My dad's mate came over from Ireland about 40 odd years ago and has worked as a labourer all his life. He's now in his 70s, built like a bricksh1thouse and the nicest guy you could meet.
One night he was walking his dog through some woods near Blantyre (a salubrious suburb outside of Glasgow), when two neds/chavs decided to mug "an old man walking his dog". Packie has other ideas. He picks up his little yappy dog, and rips a sapling right out of the ground and starts chasing the young miscreants. They bolt, and Packie gives up the chase.
But he's not finished. Instead of going home like most folk would, he hides in the bushes near his house and waits. Eventually one of the two comes swaggering up the road and into the local shop. Packie follows him in and pins the guy by the neck against the wall about a foot off the ground. Needless to say, the wee b'stard shits it and won't be doing that again!
Moral of the story. Don't fcuk with an Irish labourer, no matter how old he is.
Pop. There goes my cherry after much lurking. The length hurt at first, but got better. Now I like it.
(Fri 16th Jun 2006, 17:43, More)
» Useless advice
If you've reached Palace Gate you've gone too far...
Although in hindsight I've realised that the road you are looking for is the one after Palace Gate. Sorry old jewish woman looking for the Kensington Temple.
However, she could have been al-qaeda operative, and I've just saved lots of people. Which is what I like to think...
Can't think of a knob joke, but I'm an idiot who linked to my own site in the context of "knob joke" :)
(Fri 20th Oct 2006, 16:48, More)
If you've reached Palace Gate you've gone too far...
Although in hindsight I've realised that the road you are looking for is the one after Palace Gate. Sorry old jewish woman looking for the Kensington Temple.
However, she could have been al-qaeda operative, and I've just saved lots of people. Which is what I like to think...
Can't think of a knob joke, but I'm an idiot who linked to my own site in the context of "knob joke" :)
(Fri 20th Oct 2006, 16:48, More)
» Road Rage
Its always a BMW
I think you are given a test before you are allowed to take possesion. It involves tailgating, cutting people up, undertaking, queue jumping. Once you've proved your a twat, you get the keys.
Also, sitting in the middle/fast lane. If you are not overtaking you have no right to be in these lanes! Most of them are just too scared about being on a motorway that they think they will be safe just sitting in the one lane and not having to make any lane changes. Twunts!
(Mon 16th Oct 2006, 17:46, More)
Its always a BMW
I think you are given a test before you are allowed to take possesion. It involves tailgating, cutting people up, undertaking, queue jumping. Once you've proved your a twat, you get the keys.
Also, sitting in the middle/fast lane. If you are not overtaking you have no right to be in these lanes! Most of them are just too scared about being on a motorway that they think they will be safe just sitting in the one lane and not having to make any lane changes. Twunts!
(Mon 16th Oct 2006, 17:46, More)