b3ta.com user ThePony
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» Impulse buys

My sister
recently bought a Polaroid camera from the 70's from eBay (I know nothing about such things so at present I can't tell you what it is). It cost her a mere tenner, bargain. Only she can't find film for it anywhere, so it sits on a shelf gathering dust.

She repeats with many other random items on a weekly basis.
(Sat 23rd May 2009, 22:35, More)

» Teenage Parties

the other night
i went to a fancy dress party. it was for a girls 16th and i'd never met her but somehow got myself invited. it was all good fun however not the most exciting party i'd ever been to as it was emo central and, despite being held in a pub, severly lacking alcohol.

the most exciting part of the evening was a 6ft god (blonde, curly wig and beard with bed sheet robe), a camp pirate and two cowgirls running through town at some rediculous hour of the night shooting each other with water guns.

then sitting at the back of the bus for the hour it took to get us somewhere near to home creating an air band to blink 182 and system of a down.

we are fools. we werent even pissed...
(Thu 13th Apr 2006, 15:56, More)

» It's not me, it's the drugs talking

more mushrooms
there seem to be alot of stories about mushrooms here. so heres mine.

picture the scene - Download festival, june 2005. a weekend of great music and a hell of a lot of alcohol and drugs. t'was friday night, the first night our group camped there. in our random 'cant be arsed to go any further, dump the tent here' moment, turns out we pitched the tent next to three dealers who happened to fancy three people i was camping with.

on friday night, one guy had just made a load of money selling his paracetamol as E's and bought everyone chinese food. what he declined to mention was that in all these chinese noodles, there were several bags of magic mushrooms. everyone ate this noodle and mushroom mixture and went crazy.

two mates were running round yelling 'chips are made out of potatos!'

me and some random person i met were lying on the floor observing th epink circles we saw floating above the tents.

another mate was telling everyone who would listen that bambies mom was dead.

a few other random people i knew went off on a treck round the campsite to find who ever was playing SOAD on a CD player. they never found it.

i guess there are many more intresting stories i could tell about drugs but i dont remember them.
(Wed 21st Dec 2005, 11:14, More)

» Your Weirdest Teacher

at that college place...
My humanities teacher is a crazy guy. he is convinced he was a native american indian in a previous life. he calls himself Chief Soaring Eagle and gave all of our class indian names. i was Thundercloud. great.

Also there is another classroom that to get to you need to walk through our classroom. anyone that dares interupt his lesson he chases out barking like a dog.

On occasions he has preteded to die, sat on his desk meditating, rode his harley davidson to work and at lunch he locks himself in his car with a cup of coffee and ciggerette.

this guy has somehow has been deputy head at our college for 20 years.

My chemistry teacher is not really weird but scary. if anyone dares to skivve her lesson she storms out looking for them. and always somehow finds them. she looks like she is about to explode.

A Psychology teacher, who fortunatly doesnt teach me as he is a bit of a twat, looks like Skeletor form He-Man when he takes off his glasses.

My Maths teacher is an alcoholic who is seen at lunch times in the local shops buying vodka and repeatedly leaves our lesson comming back smelling of the stuff.

Theres also 'Geoff-woo' who walks like a pidgeon, wears 2 inch thick glasses and is generally a twat who cant teach. he fails to controll any class and if you shout Geoff-wooooo at him he looks panicky and hides. also likes to take people into his office and tell them off. next plan - poppers under the radiator in there. haha (im joking...)

every teacher is weird really

usual apologies for length, boringness, waste of your/my time
(Thu 10th Nov 2005, 17:53, More)

» World's Sickest Joke


whats the definition seal?

a spazz in a wet suit
(Wed 15th Mar 2006, 14:23, More)
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