b3ta.com user Commander Cool
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Profile for Commander Cool:
Profile Info:

I am a geordie living in Newcastle (still). I did leave for a bit and went down to that London, but missed home so came back.

Then I tried Loughborough (Loogabarooga), but that was a dump, so I came back again.

My lifes motto is - stay happy, stay positive and stay cool. If you do this you can get anything.

anyone wants to chat they can get me on ianjohnson100 at hotmail dot com

Recent front page messages:


Best answers to questions:

» Messing with the Dark Side

Ahh this takes me back....

Picture the scene, its September 1995, I have just started upper 6th and we have a new band of 1st years. I should also mention that I was a complete bastard as well (still am to be honest..)

So one dinner time we round up a bunch of the impressionable youths and convince them the backstage area of the school drama hall is haunted and we are going to do a séance.

We take them round there, pitch black, cold, damp and not nice and started to "chant!" and "summon forth the evil spirits". Then it happened.... a tennis ball rolled across the floor form the left, a rattling from the right, liquid dripping from the ceiling. The young ones shat their pants and some started to cry.

Of course it was just my mates being "ghosts". How we laughed until Mr "Pixie" McCloud collared us after hearing the screaming and crying. "I am getting mr Porter then we will see if you find it funny" Oh no! not Porter the Bastard. He duly arrived and Pixie explained the situation. Porter laughed out loud and commented "Top jape lads, top jape" and wondered off. Pixie was gutted...

That will learn the pointy eared, fat beardy puff cunt.

comment relating to length/girth etc......

Edit: I also agree with Mr Fishcacke
(Thu 20th Apr 2006, 13:56, More)

» Urban Legends

Bema Jim
That's nothing -

My ex thought that the Argentinean football team known as "Argentina", were, in fact, an English club team.

To be fair to her, she thought they were from "Down South somewhere".

Cracking tits mind.
(Wed 11th Jan 2006, 16:41, More)

» Shame

it is me

(Thu 1st Dec 2005, 16:35, More)

» Mad Stuff You've Done To Get Someone To Sleep With You

Forrest Gump
Thats a really really shit film.......
(Thu 19th Apr 2007, 15:45, More)

» My first love

On the wings of love, only the 7 of us......
Oh my first love.

Her name was Helen, and I loved her so much it hurt. She was , funny, incredibly intelegent and looked like Hannah from S Club 7, but better. After knowing her for about two years we finally got together (after much to-ing and fro-ing I hasten to add, which culminated in me being arrested for kidnap, but thats a different story)

Anyhoo... we were together for about a year before I noticed anything was amiss. Many was the time we would go out on the beer, she would ask for a particular drink and when I got back she decided that wasn't what she asked for. I just thought it was her being a typical bloody woman. It wasnt, it was the first stages of "multiple personaity disorder", (you can't say mental these days). After meeting the 6 different versions of Helen in about 4 months, often within minutes of each other, we split up after she bit me, hard on the arm and I had to have 6 stitches to patch me up. She couldn't remember doing it, and I was shit scared. Last I heard she was in a "care home".

Strange thing is I still love her in my own way. But not as much as the current Mrs Cool, we've been together 8 years this year. Because she is teh best.

No appologies ever - I am teh mucho cool. (see name for proof)

Come on Legless, more tales from you please. I know you can only have one "first love", but a couple of your shagging stories would lighten the mood.
(Tue 25th Oct 2005, 16:50, More)
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