b3ta.com user Hairy_Lee
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» Guilty Pleasures, part 2

Yes I love kebabs... I'll even eat them while sober (much to the dismay of my friends).

I know they're unhealthy but the way they smell and taste just gets me salivating.

... and now to go on a diet
(Fri 14th Mar 2008, 17:12, More)

» Fancy Dress

I actually like fancy dress
I'm quite a fan of fancy dress... always a good way to spice up a night out.
my worst costume would have to be riff-raff from the rocky horror picture show, it was only when i saw the pics of myself that i realised a fat hairy bloke shouldn't be wearing a costume made out of clingy clothing and have a jacket with the front open so that man boobs are plainly visible lol
(Sat 14th Jan 2006, 1:13, More)

» Birthdays

bad.... and good
one of the worst birthdays i had was my 20th, my then GF wanted to drag me and her best mate to see INME in exeter. so i agreed because she was paying for me. once everything was going and the crowd was bouncing around i notice that i am the second oldest person in the room (my GF was older than me). next thing ive got this little scrote and his mate using my shoulders to give them boosts as the pogo'd up and down. not that bad you say... then it happened, one of the little bastards using me as a launch platform stumbles and drags me down with him, my ankle gives out an almighty crunch and i think ive broken it, luckily it was a real bad sprain which kept me limping around for 3 weeks. and i couldn't even get drunk cos of the underaged shites all over the place

the best birthday wasn't actually mine, it was my best mates. im one of the first people to say that you dont need drink to have a good time. however, on this occasion i threw all caution to the wind and decided to go for it. we started the evening by agreeing to drink the same. first up, a bottle of cherry brandy between us at his place and a game of drunken snap, every time you won you got a shot of jack daniels.
then the moment i realise im quite pissed... i spill a glass of vodka and orange down my face as i try to drink it. i go to his bathroom to wash up, then i stumble, fall over backwards and land in his bath, which was wet.
next we go to the local nightclub of choice, luckily my mate works on the door and let us in even though i am quite clearly worse for wear. at this point the night becomes a complete blur which involve me falling asleep, running to bogs to throw up black puck all over the cubicle and my hands and a vague memory of some random whore (i was assured this was the case) sucking my finger trying to pull me while i was oblivious to this.
i only know this much because one of our teetotal friends was taking pics of the shenanigans going on.
even though i forgot most of it i must admit that seeing a pic of me aspleep on the floor of the nightclub with 4 of my mates sat on my back mate me glad i didn't remember a lot cos the pics the next day made up for it.
also, birthday boy went home a few hours earlier than me cos im a fat B3tan and had a 5 stone weight advantage over him so the drink got to him a bit quicker.
(Wed 14th Dec 2005, 0:36, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

Dont look down
Whats the similarity between standing on the edge of a cliff and having an old woman suck you off.

you dont wanna look down.

sorry quite lame

it might be long but it dont touch the sides... i had to go for a ride on the bandwagon at least once
(Wed 7th Dec 2005, 22:06, More)

» Useless Information

Words with 2 consecutive "U's"
Another word that has 2 consecutive "U's" in it is Duumvir... a type of Roman magistrate.

Woo first post
(Tue 22nd Mar 2005, 17:48, More)
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