» That's when I knew it was over...

The wheels started turning...
when she said "I don't believe in evolution."
(Sun 24th Jul 2005, 21:21, More)

» Petty Sabotage

Cling Film!
Right. When I was in school year 11. This massive wang of a six former was as usual being a complete tosser to everyone. A short but conclusive meeting was held in secret and the plans were set for the next day.

I bought 3 rolls of cling film into school and we all surprised him, wrestled him to the floor, striped him down to just his boxers and wrapped him in clingy clingy plastic. We didn't cling over his boxers(for a reason). So we taped his gob shut to stop him from calling the teachers and proceeded to carry him out into the yard. It was winter, it was wet and his skin was suffocating in every place apart from his uncling filmed nether regions. He was out there for a full 3/4 of an hour before the end of lessons came and teacher found him.

It was a sweet sweet revenge for having out bags stolen, our balls kicked and our mothers insulted.
(Sun 8th May 2005, 22:55, More)

» Guilty Pleasures

FREEDOM
When no ones a home I turn up the music and dance spazzically all around the house, leaping over sofas and then running out to the garden and turning a couple of cartwheels.

Also, picking up me three legged cat (think animal was sleeing in the middle of the road...TWAT) and spinning round and round really fast until I'm dizzy. Put the cat down and laugh histerically at it trying to keep its balance.

N.B. I put cushions around the place so it won't get hurt (thats for the RSPCA).
(Thu 7th Apr 2005, 14:30, More)

» Toilets

Peeping Toms
A few years back some friends and I, being the juvenile delinquents that we WERE, were hangning around town with sod all to do. We weren't into beating up grannies as the current trend is nowa days.

So, one girl decides she needs the toilet, we trundle over to the crumbling mess of a shed that represents the public loos. The entrance to the girls side has one door, a small porch and then another door to the main excretion area. While little miss was doing her thing, we stayed just outside. One of us said "Ey, wouldn't it be freaky if there was some guy with a peep hole eh?".

I look up. There in the porch ceiling was a square block of wood leading to the space in the roof. Little miss returns and we tell her. She is freaked and wants us to check up there. Climb on the tallest guys shoulders, slowly lift the wood and use the light from my phone to look around.

A mattress, hyperdermic needles, holes looking down into the toilets, no sign of a bloke, horrible stench of old sex and shit, and worst of all a sleeping bag and a jacket right in my face covered in somthing crusty.

Needless to say I told the tall guy to put me down. Then I watched little miss squirm when I told her. Nice...
(Sun 4th Sep 2005, 13:05, More)

» Petty Sabotage

Another one
Any spiders I find in the house (there are thousands) I pick up and put in my sisters room!

Serves her right for trying to tell me how to live.
(Tue 10th May 2005, 21:41, More)